Girls, turnoff for a guy to be Separated, not officially divorced?

I'm not officially divorced, but we have been separated for over a year now. Some people say, whatever, no big deal, but I sometimes feel in the dating scene women don't want to talk if you are only Separated?

Updates:
Yes im potebtially looking for serious relationship. Almost all dates I have been on it comes up on the first date. So I cannot Not mention, I wouldn't want to lie, as that's off to a bad start.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, I would consider that a problem :S Not in terms of jealousy with your wife, but you are still technically married. I personally would struggle to date a guy in that kind of muddle, because I would be thinking ''Well, I may like this guy but if we dated, what happens next? We can't get married...'' it wouldn't seem like its really a relationship what can end up anywhere positive until you either reunite with your wife or fully divorce her :(

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What Girls Said 5

  • Separated means you're still legally married, so women might think the relationship is not completely over. Separation is like being in limbo. She may think there's a chance you could get back together with your wife.

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  • I believe it will always be an issue especially when the girl feels like wanting a security yet you are still married.

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  • If the papers are getting processed no biggie
    If not, why are you pussyfooting it? Get divorced or be married, you can't have your cake and eat it too. The girls will think you're gonna go back to her or don't have the balls to get divorced

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  • right cause they think they r a rebound and you will go back to her.

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  • It is for me. I don't mind if a guy is divorced, but I don't want to be drug through all the drama. It's one of those things you need to work through before being a good dating prospect.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Just don't mention it to other women. Start over. I think yes, a lot of women would get more suspicious of you if you say you've been separated, but then again they can be understanding at times also. I guess even I wouldn't talk about my breakups or anything as it doesn't help, even if you were justified, to get people not to judge you.

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    • He can't not mention it! That's like having kids at home and not mentioning them until the 5th date or something, you need to be up front about these types of things (if he's actually looking for a relationship) I guess if he's just trying to get in their pants, it doesn't matter.

    • Well, it's his life. If he mentions it, it's got to be only at some point where he's not going to face a backlash. I wouldn't even mention it until like the 20th or 15th date, but this is something that's kind of private. Even I wouldn't be upset if a woman didn't tell me until later. Kids however are a different thing, a separation is something that has no bearing really.

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