He wants to pay on the second date too, what do I do?

Hi. So I've dating this guy who paid on our first date. He chose the place and all that, and it costed him 90 $. And he was okay about it but I don't like it when people pay for me.

Now we're gonna go on a second date and this time I told him that I was gonna pay, and he won't let me. What do I do because I feel a bit bad about it? He says he's a bit old-schooled at that point.

Should I feel bad about it? I don't wanna come off as not being polite.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Think about the instinct that boy birds have which compels them to offer up worms to the girl birds. Men have the same kind of instinct inside them. They want to take on the role of provider and protector, not because society tells them to, but because they feel compelled by their own nature to do so. They enjoy following their instinct and they feel frustrated when women will not let them, much like a boy bird feels frustrated when the girl bird will not accept his worm.

    Let him follow his instinct. Let him pay for the meal. Just enjoy yourself.

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What Guys Said 9

  • Assuming this is something that's actually important to you, don't just tell him you want to pay; tell him it's important to you that you do so. If he's a guy who would disregard something that's important to you to satisfy his own desire to come across as a gentleman, you have bigger problems. At the very least, you both paying for your own share (or each other's share if you want to look at it that way) can be a good way to meet in the middle.

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  • It depends on what the date is cause if its like a regular dinner date then let him pay for it and offer to leave the tip that way you would be helping out with out in sulting his feelings. If it's a movie and the theater is crowded maybe you could make a suggestion like splitting up so that he could be on one line paying for the tickets and you could be on another paying for food and drinks. That way you will both be paying and it will look like you're just trying to save time. Other then that I would just let him pay cause that's what guys do and it make us feel better about are selves. It's a Motco thing

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  • so if he is this "old-schooled", he will probably also expect you to stay in kitchen as soon as you are together xD
    if you feel, you want to pay just do it :D tell the waiter, that you are going to pay, before he can. a girl did this once to me on a date and smiled at me, while she payd. i find it a bit cheeky but it´s a cool move. if he breaks it because of that, then fuck him (not literally)

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  • If he wants to pay then let him pay haha :). It's sort of a thing most guys have.. We don't like feeling like cheap bums when we are with a girl we like. We want to impress as much as possible which yess usually includes us paying for most datess around the start :)

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  • You should ask twice, offer to pay at least a portion of it (50-50 or 75-25), if he still insists and says no then just accept it.

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  • Well, do you actually feel badly about it? Or do you just feel like you should feel badly?

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  • Let him pay, then if/when you guys get more serious, then you can take it turns, or halfs, or something.

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  • I won't feel like a man if my lady paid for me. Maybe hed feel the same way. Just let him pay.

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  • Women always offer. But men always pay. That's just how it is... it would be emasculating if you payed

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What Girls Said 2

  • Girl, go get your eat on!

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  • If you feel so bad about it, pay before he has a chance to :)

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