Do you think people that are in love are blind to see the faults?

I understand love, but I don't understand the love that people allow themselves to get hurt constantly, like the guy or girl cheating, or doing immature things, and even going out behind their back to clubs, etc.

Like is that really love. I never been in love but I know that's not love, love is simply love, sure their will be issues but not ones that make you cry almost always or fight constantly.

For example one of my guy friends, is in a long distance Miami and the woman is in Venezuela. He visits her once every couple of months.

But she goes out behind his back and he finds out she does this constantly. When she got mad at him she damaged the stuff he got her. She gets mad when she doesn't get what she wants. Like clothes or things for her hair. She's mad he works a lot but he's doing that to bring her down. She argues with him about little things everyday.

Like I don't understand, why?

Why put up with that crap.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The brain is a powerful thing, and it can go to great length to rationalize things in order to justify its decisions.

    It tries to protect you, sometimes in ironic ways. Like protecting you from the feeling of failure as opposed to allowing you to let things go and move on.

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What Guys Said 3

  • What you described isn't love. What you described is manipulation. People that are "In" Love wouldn't do that to each other. When two people are in love they go to great lengths to accommodate each other's "faults". It seems to me like your friend most likely resents this girl but is too whipped, too weak or too lazy to find anyone else.

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    • I know he loves her, they broke up two days ago and he was depressed until they went back together the same day at night. He just doesn't care how she treats him, he looks passed it.

    • That doesn't sound like love. It's more of desperation. Men, especially younger men usually get caught up in their first "love" and will do anything to keep this girl because they don't believe they could get another girl. He doesn't love her, he needs her. As long as he needs her she is going to act like this because she knows that no matter how bad she screws up he'll be waiting for her.

  • Yes because when you love someone you automatically put that person on a pedestal. They are amazing, they are the best and they can do no wrong.

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    • Do you think they would realize all the wrong eventually and leave or do you think they keep staying in the situation?

    • It entirely depends on the person or the situation.

  • Faults are what make us perfect

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    • Yes they do, but horrible actions don't. I understand faults perfectly but how others act with others is completely different.

What Girls Said 2

  • Yes love is blinding. Sometimes we'll do anything to make our loves happy
    I don't know if it's real love. I don't think it is either. It's definitely an unhealthy love.
    I've been there before and it was with men I wasn't really in love with.
    The first and only time I was ever in love, when he did things to mistreat me, I was still awake and would confront him and we had a mutual respect for each other. All my other relationships were more like what you described, and they were definitely dysfunctional. This is dysfunctional and your friend is failing to realize that. His gf is just taking advantage of him. Unfortunately I see these sorts of relationships too often.

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    • Do you think they last? He did make a step and their engaged but that was a while back ago and their still in the same state. I think he did it to prove to people that his relationship was solid because his family don't agree with him dating her.

    • Hmm that's a really good idea actually.. a friend of mine recently proposed to his GF and I was thinking too that it might be to prove to everyone that he's in a good relationship because EVERYONE hates her and thinks she's super annoying.

      I don't think those types of relationships last. Eventually they fall apart, but unfortunately it's always WAY too late. Usually after marriage and a few children, then either ends in a nasty divorce, or you have a couple who are so miserable with each other and treat each other like crap but they stay cus they don't know what else to do.

      Oh well.

  • I think that the people in love can see all the faults but they aren't ready to let go. I had a boyfriend who would never talk to me, who threatened to break into my house, burn it down, and to let my dog run into traffic whenever he was mad. He also told me that I was lucky he knew how to control his anger other wise I would be in the hospital.
    He was genuinely a good guy when I met him, but he turned into a different guy and I thought that if I waited it out things would get better. He then broke up with me saying it was my fault we weren't happy as a couple and yet I still tried to win him back. I loved him even with his faults and his anger. I knew they were there and stayed anyway because he needed me.

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