Girlfriend wants me to open up?

My girlfriend just stormed out on me because I won't open up to her. I guess she's right but I don't really know how to. I have never trusted anyone and when I try the words won't come out. I love her. I have never really had a father figure in my life but what I have learnt is that vulnerability is weakness.
I know it sounds like an easy thing to do but I have no idea how. Help/advice is appreciated,
P. S. We are both 20 and in university.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Opening up to someone is never an easy thing to do and in order to feel comfortable opening up to someone else, you first need to be completely honest to yourself about why you have trouble opening up. I understand that this is a seriously difficult thing to do, having had major trust issues myself, but once I was able to do so, I found that all aspects of my life improved, including my relationship... however, having said this, if your girlfriend can't understand that you need time in order to trust her, then maybe you need to talk to her and explain that you have difficulty trusting not just her, but people in general. If she still doesn't try to be more understanding, then maybe you need a new girlfriend who can understand.

    Sorry if I went off on a bit of a rant there btw! :p

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What Girls Said 1

  • First off, she needs to make you feel comfortable and not storm out, that's causing a bigger problem and making you less likely to open up. Talk to her about your needs in terms of this (eg. her not overreacting, need for trust/comfortability). Open up to her about why you aren't comfortable opening up and that you really care for her, and when you do feel like talking you will. Otherwise you could send her a message, I find that easier myself, it doesn't put the pressure on you to form the right words, you can proofread so to speak. I think the problem lies with her in the sense that she thinks ordering you to feel comfortable enough to open up isn't the best solution. She needs to be empathetic, sensitive and really support you, none of this storming out business. If she does this, you being able to come out with whatever you need to say will happen effortlessly.

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What Guys Said 2

  • She needs to chill her fuckin shit. You can't just order someone to be comfortable around you, and get miffed when they aren't. I mean damn.

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  • First you should date her for a couple of months or years, if you think you can trust her, go ahead

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