He asked me if I love him?

Last night, my boyfriend and I were having sex and he asked me if I was in love with him. I said, "yes" and then asked him if he was in love with me and he said, "yes" also. After sex, he couldn't settle down, he was pacing and saying how good it was and how intense he felt, then he went outside to smoke. This morning, I came home early because I wasn't feeling too great, but I texted him to say I was home and that I meant what I said last night. I asked him if he meant it too. He asked me to clarify and when I said, "you asked me if I was in love and I said 'yes' and you did too. I mean it, do you?" He replied with, "lol, hahhah, I like you a lot dear." I wrote him back and said, " you like me a lot, but you asked me if I was in love? thank you for laughing at my feelings." He told me that he wasn't laughing and for us to take it easy. I asked what "taking it easy" means, and he told me that he had to go and that we could talk about it later. So... wtf? Did he just want to see how much I feel for him? Why play these mind games? Please give your opinions. I did not respond after that. He is the one who asked me if I was in love with him. I would never have brought it up, but now I feel like I am too exposed or something.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, he liked what he heard from both ends but he could
    have commitment issues but than when you have sex
    hormones drive people to say or do things cause it's at the
    heated moment between you two. He sounds like he's in
    love with you but you want be sure this whole thing is true
    i would say give him couple days and see how things go
    when he comes around. He may have been hurt by another
    girl in the past so that's why he could be little insecure or
    could be he is insecure about you if you been hurt in the past
    it could go both ways i say wait things out and take it from there.

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    • I was hoping for a man's opinion. Thank you. He knows that I have been hurt in the past, but when he mentions his exes, he never attaches any feelings words to their stories, just what they did together.

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    • lol every time I go to leave a big rant someone's already beat me to it! Took the words right out of my mouth man!

What Guys Said 1

  • I think he was being genuine but he might mistake his feelings for love. The typical feeling feelings that make you want to be close to someone are closely linked to sex so in that moment he felt extremely in love. The day after things returned back to normal into liking you a whole lot.

    Love can still come out of this just make sure its really about you and not how you make him feel.

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    • That's a perspective I had not considered. Yes, and I agree--it cannot just be about how I make him feel. Thank you for your insight sawno!

    • Glad i could help. If you want to know for sure you should find out a good way of asking him what he likes and dislikes about you. If he likes everything about you he is obviously love blind. If he likes you for who you are while still seeing and being ok with the stuff he dislikes its true love on his part ^^.

    • Once he comes around and things are cool, I'm going to ask him. I think that will be very enlightening just to see how he responds. Good advice. Thank you.

What Girls Said 4

  • Never hold some responsible for what they say during sex. The hormones can drive a person crazy. Its fucked up what he did. And he doesn't seem to be in love with you. But sex can make a person feel in love during that moment.

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    • Thanks for your opinion. I guess we will see. I'm just surprised that he asked me. Wouldn't someone naturally ask you in response? That's the only reason I asked him back. I'm just going to back off and see what he does.

    • You didn't do anything wrong in asking. It was a legitimate response, its just what happens in the bedroom is usually out of the realm of normalcy for most people because of hormones and adrenaline. You should take some time for you self, give yourself a few days of space. Personallly I would forget that it happened after you gave yourself time. I wouldn't bring it up again unless he keeps doing it in the bedroom. If he does it again just tell him its a turn off when he says I love you during sex and doesn't mean it.

  • No. He's in love with you... he's obviously frightened of this. Maybe he has commitment issues. Sure sounds like it.

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  • My guess is that he does love you and all the feelings last night freaked him out. They were too much for him and I'm guessing afraid of that level of commitment so now he's trying to back peddle because he's unsure of how to deal.

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    • I guess, I should just give him a few days and wait for him to contact me.

    • Live and learn. I'm sure this will all blow over soon and become a funny story later.

  • I think he was just playing with you. I don't think he lied about it and there was no need for you to ask him again.. You don't want to look insecure. But I would pay less attention to the words of a man, if he really loves and cares for you, he will show.

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    • I guess I was being a little insecure and I just wanted to make sure. So, now I am wondering if I should just let him contact me.

    • Yeah, you should wait for him to say something.

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