My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years we had like a year break during that time. he's very serious about our relationship, but tends to ignore me even after getting into the smallest and most unreasonable arguments. I don't understand why he's ignoring me when he can straight up tell me he doesn't want to talk to me. Why does he ignore me, when i am more than willing to talk it out. He cools off eventually but it still bothers me that he ignores me after every little even the smallest fights. Your thoughts?
Most Helpful Guy
This is a no-brainer response. Most men know what's going on.
To put it simply, your man's ego is too big and he is too proud to apologize or make up. He is the type to never say he's sorry after an argument. You will find that 99% of the time, you will be the one who needs to talk to him first or apologize before he starts talking again. Even if he was wrong, his pride prevents him from admitting it to you. He will place his pride above the well-being of the relationship. A common theme is that he will wait for you to initiate conversation several times. He'll ignore you the first 3-4 times, then say something afterwards. Honestly, he may not even be angry at you, but he just wants to "win" the argument by having you crawl back to him by being the first to talk.
In the short term, it will annoy you. In the long term, it will threaten your relationship. His lack of communication after a dispute will not change by itself. It will slowly drive you insane - especially after he makes a BIG mistake and refuses to own up to it.
Although his behavior is childish and not very mature, you need to talk to him about it. However, you already know how he will respond if you attack him verbally about it. He will shut you out and not speak to you for awhile.
In order to address this topic with him, you need to lower your offense and do not raise your voice. You need to tell him that ignoring you after an argument does not give you confidence in your relationship and that it makes you feel like he doesn't care because his pride is more important than you or your relationship. In many respect, the strategy is to guilt trip him and let him know he is hurting you every time he does it.
The next time you get into an argument and he ignores you for a few days, just start crying in your room. That should make him feel guilty enough to break the silence and apologize.0