How should we deal with the way we both feel?

About two months ago I met a really great guy. He was a couple of years older then me, but we immediatly had a strong connection. At first though, we just wanted to be friends, because we had so much in common and could talk or text for hours about basically anything. Even at the beginning it felt like I knew him a long time and we trusted each other and shared worries and problems. After a while I admitted to myself that I had feelings for him, but because I was going to move away soon, I did not want to tell him about it, But at one of our meetings he told me that he started to have feelings for me too and we kissed. However he did not want to try a long distance relationship, because of several reasons: the age difference ( he did not want to tie me down) and most of all his personal problems. He got hurt by one of his ex girlfriends pretty badly and since then he has trust issues and sometimes phases of depression. He did not want to burden me with this. And I knew he was right about that, although I did not like it, so we decided to stay friends. But when we met again to hang out one last time before I left, we ended up making out. There was no alcohol involved or anything, it was just what we both really wanted to do. And it became obvious to both of us how much we liked each other and how hard it would be for us to be apart. We both did not regret what happend, but it did make things harder for us. I'm going to leave in a week and all I want is to tell him to follow his heart and try this relationship. But I think he is not going to do this mostly because he does not want any of us to get hurt. So I guess I should move on, or what do you think? And if so, should we even stay in contact or will that just be a torture for both of us? Thanks for your help.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Yes, I think you should move on since it won't work out in all likelihood. You can stay in contact as long as you're not using him as an excuse to not pursue other men.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I say tell him about your feelings one last time. If he still says no then take it for what it is and move on. Your feelings won't go away and you'll just stay in love with him. You could potentially miss out on great guys then because you'd still be stuck and hung up on him. It's best to usually just end all contact and move forward. Otherwise you'll just keep being reminded of what could have been and it will drive you crazy.

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