Guys. if you met this incredible, genuine girl, would you still be interested if she had a baby?

This is specifically for christian guys, but any guy id love answers from. There's this amazing guy and I've been into him for awhile. I just found out he's interested in me too, like alot. But he's concerned because I have made mistakes in the past and have a 1 1/2 year old. Id never put pressure to put him in her life, especially right away until he's ready. Im really worried because he's been a guy I've been praying for.. for years and years.
My question is, would you be willing to at least try and get to know a girl who's kind, genuine, and the perfect girl for you if she had a baby with someone who's not in either of our lives if it could potentially be the woman who's right for you? Were both 23. His concerns are fair.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • im in this situation right now, and im highly considering it! but im still waiting to clear my mind a bit before making a decision because I don't want to act out of impulse or have a clouded judgment.

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    • ooh TyvM!:) and I hope all things work out for you, you sound like an amazing individual and I absolutely applaud single mothers! they go through too much! and always manage a way to come out on top!

What Guys Said 8

  • Great question. I can see many guys being very scared and intimidated by a relationship like that because it is very different and unique to get into. He is basically jumping into an instant family. No matter how you plan it, eventually he will have to accept and include your child in his life. It would take a special person to be open to that. At your age it may more difficult depending on how he likes to live his life. You won't be able to get a babysitter every time you want to go out. So a lot of time spent together will be when you are also with your baby. I have never been in that situation, but I do have friends that are. So I can see what you are going through. For me, I would have to be gradually introduced to your baby. At first my primary interest would be you. I would understand you are a mom, but if the baby occupied too much of your attention the first few dates I would rather maybe retry to date you later in life. Some women are really into making sure their new boyfriend is going to be ok with the baby situation and may throw the baby in the guys face too much and scare them away.

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  • if the chemistry was great and I was attracted to her I would definitely consider dating her even if she had a child...

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  • It seems like a lot of young man today or just after some tail and therefore if you have a kid they don't really care as long as they can get the tail, when they will grow up a little bit they will realize that all you need to do is put us little bit of financial planning together so that your little bit more financially secure and then having a girlfriend or getting a wife that already has a child makes no difference because you're financially ready for it because you're planning for your family as it is anyways I hope it works out for you good luck
    PLURR

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  • I would try, but there would be some major - points for me..
    I just am concerned that I wouldn't be able to love someone else's child like my own child.

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  • Of course, you have to be a special person to be a dad of someone else's child. However take the time to see if your the right guy. or if he is the right guy? do not be bashful ask him straight out, Do You Mind Children that would not be yours? if he hesitates, ask him, to spend time with you and your child!! watch for any signs he is not interested in being a Dad!!! Talk to someone in a church you attend who has children with another man and is now married to a different man and ask the new Dad how he felt about being the new step-dad? Good Luck and God Bless you and your child (ren)

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  • That's a tough one for many guys, I think, Christian or not. It is a huge act of selflessness to raise another person's child as your own.

    I think that I would be willing to do it if it was the right woman, since I may or may not be able to have children of my own (medical reasons). The first thing my girlfriend said when I told her was that we could adopt.

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  • Think many guys don;t feel to be ready to be dad at 23 and so it would be kind of shock for him when he hears it but it seems he really likes you and so when he got used to the idea it will be ok!!

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  • No I wouldn't, I turned a girls down long ago because of it, I never regretted it.

    She ended up marrying the father anyway, so it was all for the best.

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    • Lol thats definitely not happening for me. But thanks for the opinion im glad you were honest

What Girls Said 0

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