Is it ok to run from a tough relationship than try and stay and help?

I started dating this gal I just met, knew nothing about her past. Bit by bit, though, I'm learning that she is the most broken person ever with the worst past.

She lost custody of her kids to her ex husband who used to beat her and now takes all of her money from her shit job due to a crappy settlement. She has few friends, no money, no stability and a neverending closet of skeletons and emotional issues.

Everyday she tells me something that scares me. I'm afraid she is suicidal, both her parents offed themselves. I don't want to be responsible for this, I didn't ask for this.

Advice?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're in quite pinch (an understatement)
    Coming from a girls perspective, I would say that if you're not serious enough about her that you'd be there for her until the end, you shouldn't keep this relationship up any longer. (depending on what you mean by relationship)
    It sounds harsh but imagine how much worse she may feel if before long you become that only thing in her life she could depend on and things just get too hard for you and just suddenly leave. That'll surely ruin her.
    What you're going through would surely scary anyone and it's not your fault for not wanting this. Just be honest to her, ask if she needs help. Tell her what you truly want and if she starts to cry or do something reckless, be there for her, even if it is for the last time. If she starts to yell, don't and I mean in no circumstances do you raise your voice.
    Explain to her if it scares you even though most men find it hard admitting to finding something scary. Just be honest to yourself and also her, and after explaining do not walk out on her immediately, stay around until you are sure she won't do anything reckless, and once she is, tell her honestly if you'll still be there for her. Don't lie about it because if sometime she's still a tad emotionally unstable and you're not wholeheartedly willing to answer her calls or just check up on her once in a while, she'll feel like a burden to you most likely do something reckless. It may seem over dramatic, but it depends on her personality really. Woman are hard to understand and when under enough emotional stress, some do something reckless.

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What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Guys Said 2

  • Ouch. I hate to say this, but this is out of your control. If the relationship isn't going anywhere, get out :(.

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  • That is terrible... I hate to say run but you are not obligated to stay with her... it sounds like you don't work together as a relationship so there's no point in staying. I really feel for that girl but if you don't want to be a part of it that's your choice... hope she can get through her storm.

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