My first dating experience was with a player?

I was dating a guy for about a month and a half. We weren't official or anything but we were seeing each other.

In a nutshell he was very manipulative and just wanted physical stuff from me. Even after I broke it off he just argued a lot with me and only seemed to care about how he claimed to feel.

He was the biggest jerk I've ever encountered. I really am a nice girl and I feel I saw good in him that wasn't there.

Thankfully it didn't go past kissing and some groping with him, but I'm disgusted that my first experiences were with this disgusting pig.

I'm really sad right now. Can anyone on here please tell me something or give me advice to make me feel better? :(

I'm not sure how to get over this.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I have always learned by the saying that has stuck in my head for as long as I have been alive: We learn from our mistakes, life teaches us a lesson And------The Next time we won't make the same Mistakes.
    Just part of life, sweetie, that has taught you to be smarter, has made you Much wiser, and Now you know what to----Look for and Not. And thank God Not All the way 'horsing around.'
    Don't be 'Really sad,' be Glad, in fact. It was for only a short time, and Any longer, Would have been Much worse, for your heart would have been next to get broken, not just your-------Furious Feelings.
    There is someone out there just waiting for someone like yourself, so feel sorry for his "next poor victim' who may Not get past His------Kissing and some groping, and most likely more of the same of his horse manure.
    Good luck. xx

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    • Another motto I have been brought up and it applies to us all: You never really get to Know someone until you------Really Get to Know them... It can be maybe in a First impression, or shorter, perhaps even a bit longer, but eventually, they all show their true colors, one way or another. Life is a gamble but next time around, you'll know that when you See the least little Red flag, to high tail it out of there in another direction... xx

    • Thank you for allowing me to be here for you, Good luck... xx

What Guys Said 2

  • Being a great guy who always sees manipulative guys doing this a lot, it breaks my heart know they hurt good girls like you. Next time, look for a great guy, not a "nice guy." Any guy can be a "nice guy," but it takes a man to be a great guy! If a guy thinks you are some sort of ATM where you put niceness/friendliness into it, and he gets rewarded with sex, he's not really a nice guy; let alone, a good friend.

    Some traits to look for in a "great guy" is somebody who is well-groomed, positive, has ambition, and always willing to experience new things with the girl he loves (non-sexual things, of course) :)

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    • He came off as a great guy at first though. And he didn't get that physical from the get go. He eased me into it gradually. I just feel so used.

      Is there any other way I can spot a great guy?

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    • Hmm okay, I noticed with him that he would say things about himself- like he was good and trustworthy and such. I don't think a nice guy would do that because it would be evident in their actions

    • Exactly! You're catching on! I think if you keep up this mentality, you will be okay soon, and find the greatest guy of your dreams! :)

  • Hey, it happens. But look at it this way, it happened for a reason. Thank him, not by saying it but in your head, for the experience. Im sure you learned a lot of things and what to look for when your with a big jerk disgusting pig. Your a nice girl, your a catch. You deserve a nice guy but you gotta know you deserve one.

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    • Aw thank you! I do know I deserve a great guy. I just am not that great at spotting them. Im very bad at judging character and I tend to see good in people that isn't there

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    • Hmmmm okay. Thank you. I do know what I want in a guy and this jerk came off as that in the beginning, probably deliberately.

      I think I will just meet guys and I'll know when I'm with a really good one. I would just like to avoid another experience like this, that's all.

    • At least now I know how to look for a disgusting pig. I won't be so naiive next time :)

What Girls Said 3

  • The same thing happened to me. He took my virginity, beat me, starved me when I was already dealing with anorexia, told me if he got he pregnant he was going to lock me in a closet so I would never see daylight again. It was awful but for some reason I was devastated when it ended. Its going to suck for a while, meet new people and make new friends. Keep yourself occupied and itll get better (: you'll find someone who appreciates you and won't take you for granted.

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    • My god that is terrible! I'm so sorry that happened to you.

    • I used it as a learning experience. I have the most amazing boyfriend/ father to my daughter now. Its hardly a memory.
      It'll get easier to deal with, I laugh about it now honestly. Karmas a bitch

  • keep urself occupied with things and time will eventually heal the wound. he isn't worth it.

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