How to happily give him space without worrying he'll lose interest?

I enjoy my boyfriend a lot and we used to spend a ton of time together. We haven't fought yet, but I feel like one is coming because I have been feeling clingy and invisible to him.
Well, now that school has started, he is with his friends a lot more and seems very happy with them. He seems happier with them than with me but that's because I suppose he's comfortable around me and doesn't put in much of an effort to show me he is enjoying his time and appreciates me, as much as I would want him to.
I feel like I should give him space with his friends but at the same time there's been an unbalance between time with his friends and time with me. I spend time with my friends too but I put in an effort to still make it obvious I care about him.
Am I being jealous of his friends and needy? Honestly I'd love to hear if it was my fault so I can work on it. I've read about giving boyfriends space and they will come back and want me again, but it's still kind of odd to me that it appears he would rather be with his friends than with me.
Is it just different to be with friends than with the girlfriend? Do you boys enjoy space sometimes and it doesn't have to do with the girlfriends? Does it bother you when we ask for a little more attention but not less time with your friends? (that's what I'm aiming for!)


Most Helpful Guy

  • Relationships must have open communication and honesty above all. Talk to him about where you guys stand in this relationship. My ex had the same issue, I was always the one initiating all the calls and texts. I felt she did not appreciate me. She told me she did not initiate calls or texts because her friends told her guys don't like clingy girls. In the end she did not change and it ended badly for both of us. If he is not willing change for the better of the relationship, you might want to move on. I don't think you are being needy nor selfish. Everybody needs space, understand that men and women are not that different. It never bothered me if my gf asked me for more attention, after all we are in an official relationship. One thing you could try is texting him two or three times a week just to check up on him. Honestly, it may be one of three things: 1) it might be temporary because school just started, 2) he's losing interest, and 3) could be both.


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What Guys Said 1

  • I would expect a BF and GF to be communicating daily. They have lives beyond and separate from their relationship but each should know and feel they're number 1.


What Girls Said 1

  • Get your own life and make him ask the same question you are asking at this moment.