Is this guy using me for sex?

First date - a bar
Second date - the movies (fooled around with him in his car.. I pursued it)
Third date - restaurant, then I asked to see his house (sex)
Fourth date - watching Breaking Bad at his house (sex, I slept over)
Now he's back from a vacation and asked if I wanted to hang and suggested tomorrow. He suggested coming over to watch Breaking Bad again and I accepted. (He's working 10 hours tomorrow.) But then the next date, probably Thursday, we can go to this bar/arcade that I really want to go to because we're both getting off of work early.
I'm an OVERLY cautious person by nature. What should I do? I joked that he's after one thing and he said no and I could not just not want to do anything sexual with him on that date.
He texts me good morning every morning. And today we talked on the phone for half an hour about random stuff.
I honestly don't know if I even want him to be my bf but I just love sex too much and he's cool to hang out with.

Background info- I'm 21, he's 24. We're both out of long term relationships. Both saving up money. He wants to move out of his parent's house by Xmas.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Of course he's using you for sex. He's been putting his naughty bits inside your naughty bits, right?

    That's cool though, because it's s a separate question from the one you meant to ask, which is if he's actually into you beyond just sex.

    Well, that'll take a while to know for sure. Unless you're friends first for a long time (and then it's always just friends) you're still getting to know each other. The fact that you're boning each other doesn't automatically mean there are romantic feelings. It just means you turn each other on and that you might develop romantic feelings as you go.

    This kind of thing is the price of the sexual revolution. Now the sex is up front and the rest of the relationship gets built (or not) on that foundation rather than the other way around. So go ahead and use him for sex and if you want more and he wants more awesome. If not, you keep looking for the connection you want.

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What Guys Said 9

  • I honestly don't know where to begin with this one.

    So first date: bar, second date: movies, third date: a meal and then SEX!
    Wow, do we guys even have to earn it any more? A drink, a movie, and a meal, and down she goes.

    Incredible. You consider yourself an "OVERLY cautious person by nature". Wow I'd like to sell tickets to when you get wild and careless!

    So you are 21, he's 24. And he's still living at home.
    Do I really need to add to this?

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  • If you are really not sure if you want him for a bf then you need to ask the original question are you equally using him for just sex?

    Sounds like you both are getting what the other wants and your going to be friends

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  • Do you think you're using him for sex?

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    • I know haha, it so comes off that way. At this point, I am.

    • I think...

    • But then I do actually like hanging out with im and talking to him

  • So you're asking to see his house, pursuing sex, and you ask if HE is using you for sex? I think he likes you but you are using him for sex!

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  • I don't think he is using you for sex.
    You are using each other for sex.
    You love the sex, and he is providing it.
    Just continue to be FWBs

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  • Nah he cool, if he wanted to use you he would hit and run.

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  • Mutual use = marriage

    Go for it.

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  • Pretty sure this is a textbook example of projection.

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  • Dont think into it. Both happy then go with flow

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What Girls Said 1

  • If he was using you for sex he wouldn't text you good morning and talk random stuff with you for so long! You do seem insecure, i find him to be a nice guy, when you are going on your next date why don't you tell him that you don't want to have sex tonight, and see how he reacts. You should be bale to confirm from that.

    Have fun! :)

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