TRADITIONAL: the man
YETI LEVEL: the woman
Oh yeah, let the shitstorm begin.
**opens shit umbrella**
Thorny question; WHO pays on first date?
What Girls Said 35
im traditional. guys will have no issue paying for a girl they really like. they might argue that things are equal or suggest going dutch - but they wouldn't do that on a date with their dream girl. so why date a guy whos pretty much showing u that ur not of much value to him?2
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Whatever works for the individual couple. I don't believe there is any "right" or "wrong" when it comes to this. Either person can pay.
Personally, I've never had to pay on a first date or even second date. I have offered numerous times but the guys have never let me. Guys where I live are typically very traditional.
But I also have a part-time job and go to school full-time so I never have as much money as any guy who asks me on a date or any guy I'm in a relationship with. And they realize this so that probably factors into it as well.0
If a guy makes me pay for the whole thing on the first date i would think they are a dick and never go out with them again. I would offer to pay for my half but any gentleman wouldn't let the lady pay for her meal on the first date. On the second or third date I wouldn't mind paying for my half at all though. I have a long term boyfriend now and I often take him out for dinner2
I never go out to eat and don't at least try to pay my half of the meal, but in my experience guys generally prefer to pay. even guys who I am not romantically involved with in any way have picked up the bill from time to time.
don't get me wrong, I don't like letting people pay for me - never have, never will. however if someone insists, it is rude to decline. I have no problem picking up the bill, and have several times just because the person I'm out with picked it up the time before.
chivalry is wonderful, but not always necessary.1
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I think who ever asks should pay and I've asked out guys so I practice what I preach. Now that I'm in a stable relationship with my fiancé we split almost everything.1
I think it is not just tradition, it is also manners when it comes to paying. It is not just I can't afford a meal ( I am not buying an apartment) .
I can afford what I can eat. It is just nice to see him make an effort to pay. That is it.
It is not a big deal really. First date is something special. Men, traditionally pays. I prefer this way. Other dates, we can split, I can pay. It doesn't really matter.0
Here's how it goes. We sit down. We eat. It comes time to pay. I take out my wallet. The guy yells at me to put my wallet away. I say I want to pay. He doesn't let me. So I put my wallet away and say thanks.
I'm not saying that's how it should be. I'm saying that's been my experience.
I have yet to come across a guy who doesn't WANT to pay for the date.4
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I'm more traditional.
Paying for things is not just the gentlemanly thing to do, it also indicates that you are responsible, steady and well-established. Women like that; it helps them decide whether or not you are relationship-ready. Yeah, being a guy isn’t always the most rewarding thing in the world. But what are you gonna do?2
I'm traditional :) It's cute and awesome when the guy looks after you.2
As the two decide. I'd personally go Dutch, I feel awkward if someone who's not family pays for my stuff.1
Who ever does the inviting should pay after the first couple of dates go dutch. When I'm invited I always pay or offer to pay my own way if the guy objects & insists on paying so be it I won't argue.2
1st official date I hope it's the guy. Subsequent dates we go on dutch1
I think they should pay for their own meal.2
Who first invite.2
It's polite foe the guy to pay, but I'm personally very independent so I offer to help and at least leave the tip if it's out for drinks or a restaurant. It's along the lines of social norms that if a guy pays it was an official date. I have asked guys to grab a drink and they have payed so it shouldn't matter who asks whom. If he doesn't pay for his/dutch then it's just hanging out and not a date.0
He invited her out, he pays.
She invited him out, she pays.
Unless previous conversations and agreements on going Dutch.1
Split it. Someone paying for me makes me feel super uncomfortable.2
I think for the first date it's a good rule for the one who asked the other out to be the one to pay. I've asked guys out before and I paid. Other than that, splitting it is.0
Men are always seen as "the man of the house", they support their family including wife and kids. I guess that is why they are always expected to pay. It's what society made us believe. Guys out there that don't pay for the meal or whatever it is are looked upon as a douche. So yeah I believe a guy should pay almost all the times, it's attractive to know a guy wants to spend on you.0
Traditional, especially if he invited. Now if it was becoming a little more serious or a relationship came out of it then splitting and taking turns paying is the way to go. Just how I see it.0
A woman who will want to split it or to pay it herself, is a feminist, and you hate them so much1
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What Guys Said 18
I always pay. I just don't take them to fancy places until I'm sure I want to pursue a relationship. There are many affordable date options out there. The whoever asks pays works too, but 99% of the time it is the guy. Splitting isn't terrible, but I prefer one person to pay then the next person gets the next one. Imagine how awkward it gets when your are dividing then bill all the way to the cent on a first date. Absolutely ridiculous2
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I'm always kind of concerned about it, because many people say it can be disadvantageous to pay on the first date, as it may suggest the man is sort of a nice-guy traditionalist who doesn't have his own standards, or especially because it may come off as "paying" for the women, i. e. trying to put her in a position where she feels she must give something back (sexually).
If I were not afraid of some confusion/misconceptions, I wouldn't mind paying for the first date at all. I'd be running low on money if I paid for every date ever, though.1
One doing asking out. Typically guys should always pay unless:
- you're both professionals - one asking out
- one is obviously wealther - default
- one is dating out of their league3
The person who makes the invite is the person who i believe should pay. Just as when i invite people to my birthday party, i dont make all my guests pay a head tax at the door to cover the stuff i may buy for the party, i would not make a woman pay for a date that i invited them to. As the relationship progresses however, the bill should be split2
I would probably pay. I don't really care who pays though. I pay for guy friends too.2
There is a certain kind of look which I don't like on the Girls face when they pay for something other than their shoes or bags. xD2
And women say they want to be treated as equals? LOL.1
but if the woman is hideous and she asked me out, and I simply said yes to not hurt her feelings... well then she better pay that bill., or its washroom window escape for me.0
Whoever did the asking out, but because I'm me, I always pay :)2
Traditional, the man *eexception* u plan on being the woman in the relationship (this is not an insult, switch roles of u like)0
the guy if he asked out
Split if she asked out0
I don't believe in dates though.1
I thought I would give a go at a little experiment where I swapped the genders and played out the scene that many girls demand from a "real man".
I didn't get as many responses as I was hoping in the few days I had it up, but it gives me several more ideas.
Well I think its guys fault in general for letting the "guy should pay" thing become the norm. Plus if a guy think he's not a "man" he's stupid and deserves to pay for everything all the time.1
It's easy to say whoever asks the other out should pay when women don't ask men out. Female hypocrisy at its finest.3
Here's my rule as a man. I pay when I want them to know I'm comfortable paying for them. First dates usually don't get paid for by me unless I've known the girl. The girl who gets upset and doesn't respond to me later because I didn't pay gets put into the bad wife material pile. A girl who makes a rash decision based on something so small is a problem to me. A girl who eats the food but expects the other person to pay just because they asked them to come is a problem for me. Paying is a gift not a qualifier. Now if I can tell that the place I've chosen is out of her price range and she makes it known, I'm a lot more lenient on paying. I also at times pick up food and bring it to the girl to avoid the whole convo. The girl I'm dating now and honestly consider marrying fights me almost everytime I try to pay for her and I love it. This last time I went to a resturant where I know they never ask to split the bill and snatched it before she could see. Paying has become a game for us. We slyly try and pay for each other before the other gets a chance. And that's the girl you want. The girl that values you more than she does a free meal or money.4
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