Does this make me a shallow person?

I used to be very overweight a few years ago but I lost all the weight to the point where I am a healthy weight. I personally can't date an overweight girl because I don't find them attractive. Friends that are girls tell me that I'm shallow and hypocritical because I used to be overweight myself. Am I being hypocritical or shallow?

  • You're shallow
    28% (5)11% (1)22% (6)Vote
  • You're not shallow
    72% (13)89% (8)78% (21)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Besides health reasons, why else do we lose weight? To attract the opposite sex. And the opposite sex you want to attract is whatever you find attractive. I don't bust my booty in the gym and eat the way I do so that I can prove how non-shallow I am by dating guys I don't find attractive. They don't have to be perfect, I'm not either. But I'm attracted to guys who work out and have a lean, more muscular shape. So if I attract them too, that's who I'm going to date.

    If I met a chubby guy who totally got my attention, I'd date him too. But the point is, I work hard so that I have options of who I'm attracted to, not to prove anything to anybody. This isn't Walmart, I'm not an equal opportunity dater. I won't date ex convicts or psychopaths just to prove I'm not shallow either.

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What Girls Said 9

  • I figure you're not hypocritical if your standards are reasonable.

    Like, it would be hypocritical of you, at a normal, healthy weight, to be like, "I am only going to date size 0's and anything else is fat!" But if you're like, "I only want to date girls at a healthy weight," no, that's not hypocritical.

    You worked hard to get to a healthy weight. No reason why you can't hold your potential partner to your physical standards.

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  • Whatever, so you have preferences and standards when it comes to what you find attractive. Everyone does... you aren't hypocritical just because you also used to be overweight.

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  • well, if you stayed overweight and turned down overweight people, I'd say yes, hypocritical. in this case, no.

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  • Every time fat women complain about how real men want them; the drawings are never fat men they're muscly men. Like obese women can demand physically fit men, but fit men can't demand physically fit women?

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  • No since you lost the weight

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  • It comes across as shallow but no it's not hypocritical

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  • I'd say it was hypocritical if you were overweight, but since you are now a healthy weight, there's nothing wrong with you wanting a woman to be a healthy weight. A lot of people care about weight in their potential partner, you are not a lone. As long as you are not putting others down, I don't think you are doing anything wrong.

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  • Lol you lost the fat, because you you clearly did not care for it! Not shallow

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  • If you were fat it would make you hypocritical and if you don't have ripped abs and you only want a girl who is real fit it is shallow

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What Guys Said 6

  • Not at all. Everyone is entitled to have what ever dating preferences they want. Girls will deny guys based on height/weight all the time. Would these girls still be into you if you were still fat? Ask your self that question. You put in the effort to lose weight, they can too. It would only be hypocritical if you were still fat and expectin to date a swimsuit model. Even then you still wouldn't be wrong, because like I said you have a right to have dating preferences no matter how strict or leaniant they may be. Dating is a privlage not a right and You get to decide who gets the privlage of dating you. They have to meet Your standard what ever they may be. Of course if you were fat and trying to get swimsuit models you probably won't be very successful, but you would still have a right to try. Congrats on the weight loss btw.

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  • Not really. You didn't like the way you looked when you where fat so you changed it. You don't like the way others look while fat so you don't date them. You just don't like the look of being overweight, both on you AND others so you're not hypocritical.

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  • I'm on the heavy side and I don't find big girls attractive. I'm sorry if that makes me a hypocrite. But it is my preferences. but in reality I don't think your preference should define you as a hypocrite. Now on the other hand if I was saying girls shouldn't be big than I would be a hypocrite. (I am NOT saying that by the way just using it as an example) So you are not a hypocrite and even if you didn't lose the weight (congrats btw) you still wouldn't be a hypocrite.

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  • Your friends are lying to you. I've had this happen to me before (although i've never been overweight). I think it's just something younger girls do. Congrats on the weight loss.

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  • That sounds totally normal to me.

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  • your friends are jealous

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