Is what I'm doing dangerous?

I usually give my boyfriend rides when he comes out of work late at night. He always decline and say no, but I do it anyways. I want to, because I want to see him. When I drop him home, we carry on enjoyable conversations and enjoy each other's company. I love sesing him, and being around him.

However, my parents keeps threatening me to stop doing that. They keep saying that it's dangerous to drive at night, and that if something were to happen, they would do something to me and him. They keep threatening me that they'll threaten and hurt him, and they keep assuming that he's using him or playing games, and a bunch of crap.

While I see the danger in driving at night, I'm not doing anything "dangerous". I'm going from one place to the next in short distance. I'm not out on the street. I'm not talking to strangers. I'm not doing anything illegal. I'm in my car, going from one place to the next, and staying parked while talking to my boyfriend. That's all I'm doing. I'm not doing anything that would endanger me. And they constantly always threaten me that they'll treat my boyfriend like shit if I don't do as they say.

I'm getting good grades, I'm working and minding my own business. Idt I'm doing anything wrong. I just want to be with my boyfriend, yet they keep pinning him as a bad image when he's not. I don't get it. He's the nicest guy who wouldn't harm a fly. He treats me well. Just help me out here.


Most Helpful Guy

  • A little more info would help. Most importantly, are they telling you to stop picking him up from work because they believe the area is dangerous, or because they believe your boyfriend is dangerous? This distinction is important.

    Another thing that would help to know is what kind of city and area in the city you live in. For example, if you're picking him up in the slums of NYC or Chicago, then picking him up is VERY dangerous.

    One more thing. Why does your boyfriend tell you to not pick him up after he gets off work?

    • He tells me not to pick him up, because it's dangerous. In part, it is true. But I'm not doing anything that would endanger me.

    • Show All
    • And I agree with them. I just don't see the need to be threaten.

    • I agree that threats should be a last resort, but look at it from your parents' perspective. They don't want you to get hurt, because they care about you. They're probably using threats because they don't know what else to do to get you to stop.


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What Guys Said 5

  • Night driving is safer actually, so long as it's a good neighbourhood and you keep doors locked. If it's somewhere isolated/with few other people you are at risk, sure.

  • In Detroit or L. A. or in the Bronx it's probably more dangerous than in Petersburg or in a small Canadian town.

  • I think you're fine. I wouldn't have an issue - as a parent - with what you are doing.

    • I wish my parents saw it the same way.

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    • Not necessarily. It's an alright city, but you just mind your business, really.

    • I guess you can ease their fears by being armed and have a cell with you.

  • If I tell you no, I would hope you'd respect my "no"

  • Sounds like you are from one of those countries where women have no rights, and families can stone their women to death for not obeying them.

    Am I right?

    • Not exactly. I just happen to live under my parent's rules.

What Girls Said 4

  • Parents have this Bad habit of being Too overprotective many times, and even when you would be 100 years old, you will always be---Their baby. They may have a few old fashion ideas about you 'Driving at nite,' and fear that something might happen, like a possible robbery or something, and lose you altogether. And any parent, I suppose, who has their little one living under their roof, would worry.
    Until you find a place of your own and can be Out on your own, your ;Own woman,' Text them every time you reach your destination, and when leaving to head home, Text them again.
    Talk to them of this game plan that might just shut the lion's mouth. I believe that is long as you are living under their roof, and although maybe of age, they will say anything to scare you into doing things Their way Or------The highway, as they say.
    Yes, a bit harsh their 'Threatening and tyranny,' but try and compromise with them so everyone lives in harmony, and not in this Nazi camp.
    Good luck. xx

    • Thank you!

    • You are so very welcome, hope everything comes out in the wash, as they say... xx

  • the thing about danger, is that often times people who get fucked up are the innocent ones just going about their life.

    if you are told by 1) your parents (2) your boyfriend and you even slightly admit that the area is dangerous yourself, then how do you not see that as a female riding around at night in a dangerous area is maybe not something you should be doing? is it going to take you becoming a victim of a crime for you to listen? if all these people saying the same thing you need to listen.

    you seem naïve and a little dumb. your parents are trying to save you from yourself. you don't get it and that's why bitches make the news and come up missing everyday

    • I've already established that I got their point. However, no need to threaten to make a point.

    • So these is no need to be rude.

    • There*

  • Your parents sound exactly like mine, controlling overbearing & trying to make you scared of everything! It's your life, I say do what you want to do if it makes you happy. There's nothing more dangerous driving at night than during the day.. If you had really bad night vision, I could see their point.. But threatening you.. That's way too far & they're going to make you start lying to get you way because they're too controlling.

  • Your parents have a point but threatening to hurt someone is a bit extreme. You're a girl and you have to accept that it makes you more of a target especially at night when you're alone waiting for him. All someone has to do is watch you for a bit to know your schedule and attack you.

    Are there other issues here? Absolutely. Your parents have a very valid point though I don't necessarily agree with how they're enforcing it.

    • That's my thing. I can see their point, but you don't have to threaten me. It makes it unfair, and unreasonable.

    • And you're in the 18-24 age zone. I'm not saying we don't do stupid things... but it's around the time where we really start to grow up. It's just not how my parents would have handled the situation