Told a girl how I feel, can I come back from it?

Okay, so, basically, I told this girl I'm friend with my feelings for her (dumb, I know, but I was already in the middle of a break down it was trying to contain), so, I want to know if I can come back from that. I know, I should've asked her on a date or something, whatever. Can I come back from it, I mean, she tried talking to me the next day anyway, and certain things happened to make me think I might still have a chance. I even think she probably liked me when we met, so, can I fix this? In other words, yes, I'm in the zone, and I need to break out. I can't wait around for time to heal my wound, I need advice on how to fix this and win her affection. Also, if you say I am in denial, then I will remain in denial about this forever, because giving up isn't what I do. That or I just find some sad desperate girl, pretend I like her, and dump her after saying I never gave a shit, that would probably make me feel better.


Most Helpful Girl

  • You just have to simply move on from it. Just act like you were before you confessed your feelings to her. You can't make someone like you. That takes time. If you keep trying to get her to like you, you'd be straining the friendship more than you should. It's better to let feelings just evolve, or else you'd be pushing her away.

    And don't be a dickhead by pretending to like a girl. Don't mess with people's feelings like that. Karma is a bitch, so it'll bite you in the ass hard if you use someone. How would you like it if some girl used you. Hell, your friend could have pretended to like you, and use your sorry ass. It can play both ways.

    Point of the matter is, you just don't force someone to like you. If she doesn't, then get the fuck over it. Big deal. You're probably still in high school, so you'll definitely meet more girls down the line. So chill, dude. Not the end of the world.

    • You're wrong, I'll find a way to end this world, fuck it, if I suffer, everyone does. Thanks for the advice, but, honestly, I refuse to follow it. I am evil to the core, and seeing happiness in others brings me nothing but despair. Have a nice day.

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    • I'm feeling down in the dumps? Noooo. I just said, "Oh well," and moved on from there. That shit ain't a big deal. You just find another person. If you cannot handle that reality, life will SUCK ASS FOR YOU. Life is too short to bitch and moan about no one not liking you back. Don't take shit to heart, and shrug it off like it's no big deal. Because, guess what? IT AIN'T A BIG DEAL.

    • FYI, I didn't bother to read your comment pass the first sentence, because you're not getting my point.


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What Girls Said 3

  • Give her time to process all of what you told her.
    What did you actually say anyway?
    I'm sure with time she will come back.

    • Just that I liked her, it was a heat of the moment type thing, I don't really regret it, I'm glad she knows, because now I don't have to hide my feelings, the thing is, I don't know if it was the right choice at the time.

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    • Thanks, my friend always tries to reassure me, I just don't believe in myself that much, no matter how much everyone else believes in me.

    • I'm sure she appreciates that you told her sooner rather than later. She will either like you or dislike you. You can't go back on your word now having admitted it all, you can only go forward. So grab all your courage within and ask her out :) It's better to know now if ever you'll have a chance than waiting forever along the friend-zone line.

  • First of all.. absolutely do not fake liking a girl then dump her and be an ass about it! Wrong way to treat a girl and who knows you may make a bad rep for yourself in the world of girls in your area who knows.. but anyway take it slowly and give her time to process everything and make the decision of if she wants to really be with you or not, of she doesn't I would think she would still be your friend as long as you accept it and let everything go back to normal.. hope this helps a bit

    • Perhaps, but, the girl thing, that's because I've already been used, and I've had girls like me that I didn't really care about, I know how good it feels. Anyway, I don't want things to go back to normal, we're already comfortable around each other, but, I won't just let myself slide back into that friend role again, I plan to change things, I can't do that being the person I was before.

    • Ok well then forget the back to normal part but still give her sine time then try to talk about it again but don't overall her with to much at a time and ask her joe she feels about the situation

  • I thought you were "in the zone"? Why need to win her over if she's already there?


What Guys Said 3

  • That's a negative ghost rider. Irreprehensible damage has been done. Just be glad that you learned this valuable lesson at such a young age. Do yourself a favor, don't try to be friends with girls. Look where it got you this time. But, if you prefer to keep testing the flame to see if it burns, then by all means friend it up.

    • I didn't become her friend with the intention of dating her, I became her friend because she was cool and only became interested later on.

    • "I didn't become her friend with the intention of dating her" -

      And that's exactly where you went wrong.

      Look, you're super young, and no one said you have to figure it all out by the time you 20, or 30, or ever. But certain major concepts, understanding your own motives and that of others... the sooner you figure that out, the better.

      Almost no girl will ever want to be your friend unless she:

      1) Already likes you in some way or another (this will usually come from a girl you are not into)


      2) Thinks you are not a sexual threat to her and will only ever be her buddy/boy toy. And this of course usually happens when you like her which exactly what you're going through now.

      Listen asker, this took me till 27 to figure out the guy/girl being friends thing. Here's an easy way to look at it:

      *Be Honest*
      Would you ever want to be friends, could you see yourself being friends with a girl you were not attracted to?

  • Ask her out.

  • it's normal.

    just be honest about your feelings, to her at the least.