How not to mess up after a great first date?

I suck at dating. I'm willing to admit it. I started later than usual, and I haven't had enough experience to feel confident. But I've been on a ton of dates in the last couple years, and I feel a little better about it.

I've been on a few great first dates, but I find a way to mess it after the first date. Either I text too much or not enough or don't say the right thing or something.

I went on a great first date tonight. So what am I supposed to do now? Do I text tomorrow? Call tomorrow? Wait longer? Should I be flirty? Aggressive? Play it cool? How soon is too soon to try and go out again? Too late?

Basically, I need all kinds of help on what to do after the first date. I'm good at getting the first date. The first date goes well. Now what?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yeah don't go overboard! Just text or call her maybe a day or two later and say something like "Hey, I had a really great time the other night. I'd really like to see you again!" and go from there. There's no special number of days you should wait between dates either - you could go out again tomorrow if you wanted to, lol. But you should try and see her again within the next couple of weeks at least. You could tell her you'd like to see her next week to set things in motion.

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    • Yeah we had that talk afterwards. I said I had a great time and would love to see her again, and she enthusiastically said she'd love to also. But girls have told me that before and they were just being nice. It's hard for me to tell now. So assuming she's on the fence, I just don't want to do something to turn her off.

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    • No problem, thanks for helping. And thanks for asking!

      So far so good. She said she'd like to go out again. Trying not to be clingy or needy - going to talk to her this weekend and try to set up something for next week.

    • Awesome! Yeah if you don't text or call her like every hour, you'll steer clear of clingy-ness, lol.

What Girls Said 1

  • Text the day of and tell her how much fun you had

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What Guys Said 3

  • Jesus I had the shits when I went on my first date with my current GF, it took me 40 minute tube right to compose myself and get rid of the sweat patches in the process. But the moment I first saw her nervously pulling her hair back behind her ears as she scoured the area for me, I knew she was the girl for me.

    At the end of the day, nerves are great and are actually there to help you. If you feel nervous, just tell your self "it's going to be fine because I'm going to be myself"! ... Just please, for the love of Christ, don't take her to some boring old shit fair ok?

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  • relax and take it easy but make it clear you really enjoyed it and be totally straight say hey id love to do that again if and when your free, just give me a shout and we can arrange something!

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  • Play it cool man. Your all over the place. Just say I had a great time and ask for another date.

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    • Ha, I know. I wouldn't be if I hadn't messed up so many times.

      Afterwards, I said I had a great time and she said she did too. I told her I'd love to go again and she said she'd love to also. But I've had that exact same scenario happen a bunch, and sometimes she's just being nice. I'd just like to not blow it this time.

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