Would you date someone who had small kids?

I had this dream last night where my crush had two small kids from a previous relationship.
It really freaked me out, I don't really know why, perhaps because if I imagine having a family with someone, I would not want to see the products of his previous relationships running around and the fact that he will always have this special bond with someone else.
It might be due to my current age (30), because I imagine, if I am older (40-50), with kids myself, I probably would not mind it.
How do you feel about those things?

Updates:
as some people mentioned how much they love babies: This wasn't a question about kids. This was referring to the situation that there will often be another (ex) partner involved.
But thanks everyone for your opinion!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I dated with someone who had a kid. He was full of problems. I don't know where to start.
    If you get into that kind of relationship, beware you will deal the mother forever. You can't judge because it is their reality. You can't get involved because it's not your problem either.

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What Guys Said 8

  • so basically would I date a single mother? yes I would:)

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    • What do you mean by dating? I did not explain that, but I am referring to the actual idea of having a long-lasting relationship (like @dartboard explained). Thinking of marrying that person etc. Would you still do that, esp. considering, that the kid will most probably live with the mother and you might want to have kids of your own?
      I am not judging you, that is obviously a great open-minded personality, just asking from my perspective and feelings. :-)

    • brutally honest, I would highly consider it, I was in that position only once in my life. but she shot me down. well okay she didn't shoot me down it just didn't work for her I guess. but I was serious to commit to her beautiful baby daughter.

  • I don't go looking for someone with kids, but if we click and they do, it shouldn't be a reason not to go for it.

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  • I would and I'm glad that my gf did too. My daughter was 8 months when we became official. There are a lot of people who feel like you do and it's ok. I don't have any kind of bond with the ex at all (I have complete full custody of my daughter). My daughter was truly the only things that came out of that train wreck of relationship.

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  • I would not get involved with a single mother. Its not a popular thing to say but the goal here has to be honesty. I don't want kids of my own so I certainly don't want to deal with someone else's. I do have kids in the family and I love them all, but they don't live in my house. The only reason to date in my opinion is to find a life partner and that means sooner of later those kids would end up part of my everyday life. Being in a relationship with a single mother means you have to deal with the father and that always adds a pile of mess to this too.

    I know myself well enough to know this would be a bad thing for me at this time. Maybe in the future things will be different but I'm already married to a wonderful woman with no children on the mind so I'm pretty sure it won't matter to me.

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  • Yes I love to... But I guess that you have a big doubt... PLEASE DON'T... And be your self.

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  • HELLLLLLL NAAAAAAAA

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  • No, I wouldn't.

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  • hell no. no way

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What Girls Said 4

  • If I was in my twenties or more and be financially stable when I was coming into their lives, absolutely! I love being around children and crying doesn't bother me at all after years of taking care of my little sister and now watching over my baby cousins. :) There is nothing little kids can do that can throw me off XD And I grew up with a larger and very close knit family :D

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  • Yes. I love babies!

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  • I'm too young to talk about kids but, I don't really like kids.
    And I know someone who dated another one with small kids, they didn't progress in their relation, didn't know why. Months after, they broke up, because the kids were an "obstacle" for the woman.
    But, there are people who looooooove kids. The thing is: do kids love stepmother/father?

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  • Yes, if the kids were very little so that I could have a great amount of input into their raising OR if they were teens about ready to leave home.

    It would also depend on why he is a single father. Is he a widow? Of course I could understand that. Did they break up and what were the reasons? It would depend on the circumstances of the break up and if the mother is still hanging around.

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    • your second point also made me thinking. considering he is a father of very small kids and they just broke up (like not getting along anymore or sth. simple) so soon after having them, I would feel that this person would not be "mature" enough to cope with having a family and therefore not be marriage material.

    • That is certainly a concern; you want someone who is not going to give up so easily when the going gets tough.

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