Help, I'm in love? Is this a normal thing (read description)?

Has anyone else been so in love that they don't know what to do with themselves? I'm suffering (although it's a good kind of suffering XD) from this myself right now. I have a HUGE crush on this guy like he is my everything, i literally understand the meaning of 'can't stop thinking about you' now. He's my teacher though, so it's not like i can ask him out or anything. I was just wondering what y'all do when you are just fangirling and squealing at pictures of him all day and all night long! I keep doing this! I just don't know what to do with myself. I feel miserable, yet I love the feeling of it <3


Most Helpful Guy

  • I was just having a long discussion about this today, interestingly enough, about how the English language really, really sucks at differentiating the different feelings that are all classified as 'love' in English. By the time you get to your mid 20s, probably quite a bit before that, you will understand a different kind of love, and realize that what you are actually feeling right now is not love, but infatuation. It is super common amongst teen girls. Some teen boys too, but not as many for some reason.

    The 'fangirl squealing', 'thinking of nothing else', staring at pictures... they are all elements of infatuation. What you see on TV and in movies, what they call 'falling in love' is usually just an infatuation - people meet and have a strong immediate physical attraction. There isn't such a thing, really, as love at first sight. It is infatuation at first sight, and it eventually can grow into a mature love, but most times it does not.

    Crush and infatuation are generally synonyms. When someone has a crush on someone, it is almost always, in every case, infatuation. Love is something that grows slowly, over time. It is about more than physical attraction, it is about acceptance of a persons flaws, acceptance of them as a person, and about caring for what it is in their best interests, not yours. Crushes, or infatuations, happen fast. They come on like a train, and just overpower you wit emotion right away. When infatuated, the person will usually gloss over or ignore arguments to the contrary. Infatuation is about the feelings YOU feel, not the other person. The target can be just about anyone, and can be someone you don't even know personally, which is why so many girls fall 'in love' with singers, actors, people in the public eye, figures in authority - people they do not even interact with in a meaningful enough way to actually 'love'.

    You cannot love him in the 'real' sense of the word because you don't even know him, even if it feels like it.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Good news for you, you're only in lust, not in love. Masturbation will get him off your mind for a bit. Eventually you'll get over it.

    • whats the difference? you don't know my feelings and why i love him. But i do love him.

    • He's your teacher. You don't know him, you just have an image of him, and you're consumed by that image. It's a schoolgirl crush on your teacher. It happens ALL the time and it's never love. When you're older you'll laugh at yourself for thinking it was love (we all look back on our teenage selves and laugh at what we thought we knew). Love comes from knowing a person and sharing meaningful experiences over time. You can't do that in a classroom.

What Girls Said 1

  • I think you need to really look at why you love him. Have you eve had a really serious conversations? Do you guys connect? Make a list of stuff you really like about him. If you can come up with real reasons and no just "he's so nice" than maybe this is the real deal. If it is you need to realize that he can get in some serious trouble if you go down that road. It might be tough but you need to probably wait and see how you feel in six months.