Am I overreacting? Or is he a bit of a hypocrite?

I've been on 4 dates (drinks/dinner) with a guy I met online. Dates have generally been wonderful, but sometimes I think he is too concerned with appearances. I should add I'm a sensitive person.

Two examples from last night:
1) I was sitting on his lap on a bench on the waterfront at night. We were making out, then starting to laugh cause we could hear this party boat off shore with terrible 80s music. Just being silly, I gently rocked to the beat for like 10s and then he told me to Stop (as if it was embarrassing). Then a moment later, the boat came to the shore, right where we were sitting. And then he started singing a bit and really rocking and moving his arms to the music? Kind of hypocritical I thought.

2) We were cold so we went back to another bar. He was telling me that my hands smelled good, so i took a couple quick whiffs of my hand, cause I couldn't smell anything. Then he said my hair smelled good, so I took a quick whiff of that (not a creepy, long whiff), and He said something like, stop, why are you doing that? That's not very classy.
Mind you, I was a bit tipsy and he was probably a little drunk. I pretended to pout and he apologized, and then I just let it go, cause it didn't seem worth it to start something so stupid.
And then he placed his drink on his cheeks to cool himself down... ok, thats not exactly classy either.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • A little of column A, a little of column B.

    You are definitely being a little sensitive, a lot of people wouldn't pick up on that. But he was definitely being hypocritical.

    Telling you to 'stop it' is a bit of a control move. Particularly if he then went and pretty much did the same thing. Same thing with telling you to stop a behavior in the bar - it's not really his place to be telling you how you should act. And an asshole thing to claim it's not 'classy'.

    I would actually consider those some mild warning signs, to be honest. This guy may have some potential to be controlling, and when combined with hypocrisy could definitely drift into asshole territory. Too soon to claim that for sure, but I would pay attention in future.

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What Guys Said 1

  • It sounds to me like you're making something out of absolutely nothing.

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What Girls Said 1

  • These are small subtle warning signs of a jerk. Beware. He will just get worse.

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