I ignored him because I found out he's dating someone else. However, keep on chasing me back?

I've meet this guy through a dating app. We went on 4 dates and he made me feel like we are in a relationship. We hold hands in public, we kiss, but thank god, we still have not had sex. I felt like I was in love and he made me felt like I was wanted and loved. He's been ignoring my messages when he clearly have saw it. Recently, I felt that his attitude has change towards me. I found out that he was flirting and seeing another girl. I understand that since we are not in a relationship, you can date other girls. But he made me felt like a relationship. I decided to send him a message saying I don't want to have anything to do with you again. He sent me multiple text messages and I still ignored him. He called me and we had a conversation about what's going on in my mind. He told me I don't want to lose you just like that and you are not my option. I care about you. I asked him about the other girl and he admitted it. He confronted me about all those lies he made. Then he said he wants to keep talking and hanging out with me. He wants to be in a relationship with me however, he doesn't know where to start.
I told him exactly how I felt and that i felt betrayed and cheated. I felt your full of lies. I see you all the time on your messenger and you don't reply my messages. He said he never ignored me but obviously he did. He told me not to have high expectations from him which made me really sad to hear that. I told him that I had a bad past and don't hurt me. I'm trying to protect myself. If your nice enough to please let me go. He told me that he knows i'm a girl who needs to be treated right. But he's been keeping me in this grey zone (not a relationship but just like a relationship).
I am so devastated and upset because seems like he's playing me and plus he's talking to some other girl. But then, when I ignore him, he would chase me back and then ignore again! HELP!!! What does he want?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm gonna be honest with you girl and I hope you'll humbly recieve it with an open mind.

    While I can see why you feel how you feel and in no way am I dismissing your feelings, he technically had no obligation or duty to be loyal to you. Unfortunately in a society were promiscuity is encouraged, this comes along with it: you can date as many people as you want and it's okay as long as you're not official. This is an attitude that many people adopt and the only thing you can do is repsond to it by limiting what you give of yourself unless things are official, not just sexually but mentally and emotionally. Save a piece of yourself that only gets activated for a BOYFRIEND and commit to the decision that any other guy only gets to experience so much of you and what you have to give. This is the best way to avoid heartache in a situation like yours.

    Btw, he's shady and your life is better off without him and his childish, low self-esteem having games. Dispose of him A. S. A. P.

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    • I agree with you! He has no obligation to be loyal or faithful to me. I think I'm expecting too much. Thank you! :)

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    • Wow, i hate guys that leave girls hanging. At least have the guts and man up to tell how he feels and what his plan is. Like for me, if he straight up and told me he's not looking for a relationship and just see how it goes.. i wouldn't throw so much emotions into him and got myself hooked. He didn't tell me until last week that he doesn't know what he wanted. When we first met, he said he wanted a relationship! I hate guys like that. They are full of shit! I hope one day, they truly fall in love with someone and that girl would just leave them hanging so they know how it feels!

    • Just commit to your decision and make sure you never give him another chance at a place in your life.

What Guys Said 2

  • So he is a liar, a manipulator, and a guy who is willing to flirt with someone else?

    So you want a cheating, lying manipulator?

    My advice is to get away from this guy. You said thank God you did not have sex with him. Well, ten years from now you will still be saying that! So don't!

    Get away!

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  • You're expecting too much from him. You said you felt hurt and cheated. If you two were together, then that would be true. But he hasn't done anything wrong.
    You either need to date other people too, or leave the poor guy alone. Because you're pressing him for a relationship, when he's not ready for that right now. So he doesn't want to lose a chance with you. If you tell him you don't want to date him anymore, tell him the truth. You want a relationship and he doesn't want that right now. But don't make it about "he wronged me", because he didn't. You're not together

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    • I guess you're right! I need to calm down I think I'm thinking to much.

What Girls Said 2

  • he is a player. the "he made me feel like I was wanted and loved" was a manipulation tactic to get you to fuck. since he spent 4 dates and he didn't get no pussy he probably felt like it was a lost cause and stopped talking to you. you sending him that message showed him that you did have feelings, and to a player - if they know u care and have feelings, there is always an opportunity to manipulate you.

    what you should have done was just quit talking to him and ignored him. now you have opened the door bc he realizes he can still play you bc you miss his attentions and (fake) feelings of love.

    by the way if you tell a guy that you had a bad past, he won't feel sorry for you. he'll just know that other guys have successfully ran game on you too and that your probably an easy target. don't tell guys your past business until you are very serious and a commited couple

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    • You could be right! Thank you for your opinion!

  • He wants you as a back up plan, sweetheart just ignore him

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