When do I put my arm around a girl?

I've been going out with a girl a couple times, and I don't know how to make a move.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Try to enter her personal space. If you're able to stand in close proximity to her, she's comfortable with your presence close to her.

    So let's say you're walking, try to walk close to her. If that's fine, then inevitable you'll accidentally brush your hand/arm against hers. For me, because I'm a bit awkward to walk that close to my girl, I sometimes trip over my own feet and bump shoulders with her. But she doesn't shrink away, so that's a good sign.

    Or when you're sitting down, if it's not too forced, sit beside her instead of across her. Don't squeeze yourself right beside her, but leave a small gap, so that sometimes shoulders touch or elbows hit each other. If all goes well, find some excuse to show her something on your phone. I take the chance to lean onto her thigh with my forearm, moving my face closer to hers.

    If all of this went well, you can try putting your arm around her. Even if she tries to shrug your arm off later, it won't trigger as much of a negative reaction, because she's already comfortable with your touch, but maybe that was just too much too fast.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Try grabbing her hand, that might be easier for you

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What Guys Said 1

  • Just be sitting next to her and put your arm around the girl, if she is not in to it then she will say so. I usually do something else, if we are walking next to each other in a hallway or something I will brush her hand first then try to hold her hand, if she doesn't want to she will pull away, but if she is in to it then you're good.

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