Is it possible for a guy with aspergers to get a girlfriend?

I was reading statistics and they are not good less then 5% of aspergers people get into relationships so my question is it really that bad and am I just pretty much gonna be single


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm a girl with aspergers and I'm in a relationship. Don't give up dude!

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    • Inspiration cause you probably understand me better then anyone else that answered this cause you have it

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    • Well I think everyone does that to an extent. I am terrible for re-reading messages thinking well what does that mean. I'll do that for days if a message is particularly confusing for me.

    • Thanks for MH!

What Girls Said 5

  • Yeah, like what that guy said! Don't give up! Don't let the statistic tie you down for the rest of your life. Don't let this discourage you and take away your chances of finding someone. I adore people with aspergers! You guys are so smart and so clear of what you guys want! Tenacious, in a good way :D

    But hey, this tends to be cliche, but it's true. Nobody's perfect. You weren't born to impress anyone, so don't let your aspergers be a weakness to you. I don't wish or intend to "sugar-coat" anything, but one day you'll find someone who'll appreciate you :)

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  • I was in an on and off relationship with an aspie for about a year. It wasn't easy. Not because he had Asperger's, though.

    When I found out that he was an aspie, I started reading a lot of articles and forums related to the syndrome and learned "the basics" of it. I educated myself to understand him and everything was well, but every month or so he would get lost with his school/job and wouldn't talk to me for days. I was aware of the fact that some aspies tend to have a large list of priorities, and his did not include me the way that I would've hoped for. We were very honest and straightforward with each other, so I told him that I wasn't comfortable with how he got lost with his stuff and pretty much forgot about my existence. He wasn't comfortable with the fact that I wasn't comfortable and it was little things like that that made us break up.

    My point is, no, you won't stay single. I'm pretty sure there are loads of girls who'll be willing to be with you. But if you end up in an Asperger's-neurotypical relationship, it's VERY important for both partners to understand that the way your brains work is very very different. So, of course, both the NT and the aspie will have to try and understand each other's thoughts, emotions, and needs in order for the relationship to work out. Always be honest! (That's a must for any kind of relationship, really.)

    Good luck! :)

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  • Can I just make a suggestion? Most relationship focused girls don't want to see you with your shirt off before they know who you are. Your photo gives the "impression" of a player type. Sorry, I misunderstood you before. Just trying to help. Isn't that the issue with having Asperger's primarily of being misunderstood socially? I believe you can find someone who will understand you.

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    • I do it to get a self esteem boost cause its really low

    • I see. Is it working for you? I don't think it's a good way to build self-esteem. Here's a boost. Except for the "image" of a player you. Your seem like a nice sweet guy and I'm sure the right girl will see that and jump at the chance for a relationship with you. Don't give up!

  • No, not at all. I totally understand it and if you're nice to me, it won't stop me to like you and date you. :)

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  • look up Sean Stephenson and Nick Vujacic, those guys didn't let their disabilities stop them!

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    • did you look them up?

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    • But mine is not a physical disability its a developmental disability

    • are you familiar with the site WrongPlanet? they have a lot of threads there and advice regarding Asperger's and dating, social advice

What Guys Said 4

  • Why are you giving up? Don't give up. There is a girl out there for you if you are willing to get out there and look, and to be honorable. Listen to your instincts, I believe Aspberger people have them sharply.

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    • We do but I believe I'm sharp all most to the point it would turn a women off

    • I have never told anyone this before, but learn to turn it down! It has taken me years to hone my instincts, which includes not listening to stuff I thought were my instincts, but weren't. Turn it down my friend, relax, be calm. You will find someone if you are open and out there.

    • @We do but I believe I'm sharp all most to the point it would turn a women off

      can you elaborate on that.. bc i think i have that ;) id like to know what you mean.

  • i have Asperger's too and i don't want to think it is hopeless but i'm trying to believe that i don't have it, some people, such as Gary Brodsky, who i believe speaks the honest truth a lot, says it doesn't exist, that it was made up by the Medical community, government as a way to extort money

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  • That stat sounds right

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  • i hope it is possible

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