First kiss with this guy was a disaster, please help?

I'm in college, but I haven't had a whole lot of experience kissing anyone. I'm extremely shy. I had kissed just two guys before the other day. The last guy I dated a couple months ago told me I was a good kisser the very first time we kissed. And that made me feel really confident so every time we kissed I knew it was good and I wasn't afraid to do it. It didn't work out with him but I've been seeing this new guy for over a month now.
He totally caught me off guard the other day and kissed me right after holding my hand for the first time which made me nervous already. Then once he started kissing me he kept it going for what seemed like forever and he used his tongue which threw me off a little considering we'd never kissed each other before. It was really awkward and I didn't enjoy it cause I was so nervous.
I mean, I really like him a lot, but the kiss was bad and I guess it was my fault. Because he texted me and asked how many guys I've kissed and then I said "I'm sorry if that kiss was bad" and he said he didn't want to have to say it. I tried to explain that I'm weird about physical stuff at the beginning because it makes me so nervous and that I wasn't expecting it. He said that was fine, and he just felt weird afterwords. I apologized again he said "haha you're adorable" so I guess he still likes me?

I feel so embarrassed about all of this. Everything was going good up until that kiss. And I feel like it was all my fault since I'm the one that doesn't have a lot of experience. Can anyone make me feel better about this?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Ugh. I hate when a guy uses tongue, especially on the first kiss.
    Next time you can make things a little more intimate, gently say in his ear something like "let me make up for that last kiss" and kiss him very slowly and on your terms, not his. He tries to stick his tongue in again, pull back. Then continue the kiss again. Until you can get that time together though, don't act awkward. Just don't bring it up. It's not a big deal if you don't let it be one.
    I rarely allow tongue in my kissing, I hate it so much. I have literally tapped a guy on his nose saying "no" after he tried for a third time.

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    • I think that was a big part of my problem with it. I don't really like tongue either, but I don't want to seem rude and tell him not to use it if that's what he likes to do

    • Girl, have more confidence! If you don't like it don't go along with it! That's how girls get pressured into sex! It all starts with french kissing when you don't like it! There's no telling what he'll do next! Kidding.
      Seriously though, if you don't like it, don't do it. I only allow tongue for the guys I've been dating and really like. And they know it and that it's a treat just for them.

What Guys Said 2

  • Consider how much worry it is worth spending on it. It's done. Fuck it.

    In my experience, these things between people get better the more you know each other anyway. I mean, sex can suck the first time, but after you get to know each other's moves and bodies and stuff, it can be awesome.

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    • Just remembered: One of the first times I kissed a girl, she asked me why I had my eyes open while we were kissing. I felt so dumb, but am really glad she told me.

  • He shouldn't tell you that i think its rude if a girl tell me this i would break up with her

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    • Trust me: That is a recipe for disaster. You have to be able to handle some criticism in any relationship.

What Girls Said 3

  • I can relate so well! I'm also in college and really shy. I've only been kissed 3 times. To prevent this from happening to me, I warn them before that I don't have much experience and all three guys that I've kissed have been really sweet about it, telling me not to be nervous and that they'll teach me. ;)

    So don't worry too much, he must find it cute how you don't really have experience, he was just not expecting it probably. Just ask him to teach you. ;)

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  • Practice makes perfect. If he likes you, there will be a lot more kisses coming your way. And you will definitely get better. I don't blame you, you just haven't kissed enough (people) yet.

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  • Just make the next one the best. He'll forget all about it. Now that you know he's ready for the next step just be prepared.

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