I think I am having a mental breakdown because I am 29 single no kids. Wd I do?

I have done everything to meet Mr right. All I meet are Mr Wrongs. Guys who just want sex or have commitment issues. So I stay single. I know the fact I am timid homebody has a lot to do with it. I have done online dating.

I also love white guys but they hate me. Makes me sad
:(

The last guy put the cherry on top of the 7 tier cake. Ladies my age how do you stay positive?

Updates:
I am not looking to rush but damn I wish I had someone who was hubby material in my life. That actually viewed me as wifey material.
Everybody please read chocolate dragons comment. How can a guy basically say you are ugly not realize how hurtful that is? I date all men. I value personality most of all. I have dated fit cute guys to chubby average or below average guys?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • There are some things you make happen and loves not one of them! They say that when you least expect love it will walk In to your life. Man are you an idiot. You can't see the forest because of the trees! Quit LOOKIN for mister nice guy because you are passing them all up! The reason you cannot find what you're looking for is because you don't know what you want. It must be obvious because you haven't found it yet. Anyway you coming into the Mistine instinct age of a woman quit looking at the rappers and look on the inside of a man then you'll find what you're looking for

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What Guys Said 16

  • I seriously doubt white guys hate you. There's nothing wrong with being single with no kids at 29, a lot of people are in that situation.
    You might want to change your mindset to be more positive, the more optimistic you're then the easier it'll be to go through challenges. Its not hard just don't make finding a husband your primary goal, your career, or education should be there.

    Or even becoming a better person. Focusing on these things will involve you coming into contact with people of like minds which includes men, : )
    You shouldn't care if the guy's white, black, latino, or etc...
    The more you focus on important factors such as a man's character then the easier it will be to find husband material.

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  • White guys don't hate you. We're just apprehensive about meeting your parents.

    Stay off of online dating. Serial daters never leave those sites, so they end up as the majority on them.

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  • You shouldn't be searching for someone. The right one will eventually run into you. Trust me. just wait and itll hit you like a semi.

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  • You met à bunch of Mr. Wrongs because you have a high standard. Unfortunately, your face does not compliment your rack and overall slim figure. You have a body men like, but not the face that makes them put commitment down which is why they will go after you mainly for sex. What you could do now is kick back and go on casual hang out with friends and start valuing personality over looks. I'm not telling you to hit up guys you're not attracted to, but they don't have to be hot either. And lastly stop limiting yourself to white guys, there are 50 shades of guys out there. Your lover might not be in the vanillic shade.

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    • @MaskedSanity
      I'm definitely seeing how her personality is the problem now. And I can't just ignore the fact that attraction plays a role too. Before someone even gets to experience her personality, they would have to see her thus quickly scanning her face. And if a good guy was turned off by it, then yes attraction does somewhat matter. That's all I meant by it, but I forgot to mention some personality defaults. She did claim to be very timid which can cause problems in the dating world.

    • @chocolatedragon

      Of course attraction plays a role, but it's not like she's uber hideous. It's something else. Her face is not even half the problem and thus I don't think it was necessary to mention, especially in such a rude manner.

      I've posted my stance on this, if you care to read.

  • You just got to find a guy that will treat you well. That's not always easy to do I would imagine. I bet it's even harder to find a good looking guy with a good job that will treat you well. What can you do? I don't know your personality but working at becoming a better person can help I think. For the people saying you aren't pretty, I think you can take a much more flattering pic from a more horizontal angle with a warmer facial expression.

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  • Just focus on you... be who you want to be and be proud of yaself.. sooner or later, you'll bump into someone doing the exact same, and grow together

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  • Here here. I'm 29 and still single too. It bothers me too. Although I suppose there's less societal pressure on men to get married and have kids. I suppose this might be the reason why you're stressing out about it more than I am, societal pressure. If you try to rush into it too quickly, you'll wind up regretting it. There's plenty of adults who don't reach marriage until their late 30s early 40s.

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  • If your looking to have a child adoption and perm donors might help.

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    • I don't want to be a baby mama. If I wanted that id would have been pregnant at 19 by some thug

    • Perm donors lol

    • Lol oops meant sperm donor not perm lol. And I didn't mean it like that if you want a guy who will treat you right then try to surround yourself with those types of guys. And those types of guys probably won't be at a bar or night club not to say that was were you were looking in the first place. But you get my drift go to the types of places were your ideal guy would most likely be.

  • Try being 20 and never been intimate with someone

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  • What do you do?

    You reap what you've sown.

    Hope you like cats! Perhaps Mr. Fuzzy won't disappoint you the way Mr. Wrong did.

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  • Could do what Nikki Bella did, freeze your eggs

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  • I think you are beautiful and you may have learned behavior that has taught you to go after the wrong guy.

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    • Not sure how I am getting insulted when I only asked for coping mechanism

    • It is possible that you need to forgive some people in your past? Is it possible you are attracting the same type of jerk guy? Like I said you are a great looking lady and a white guy (like me) would date you in a heartbeat.

  • I'll say what noone else is saying:

    1) Your face isn't that great.

    2) Judging by your cleavage, your body isn't particularly noteworthy.

    3) You're black.

    Dating is a hard game, and some people just strike out. I wouldn't date, let alone marry, a girl who didn't at least have a nice face, and no offense but I don't want my kids to be black.

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    • As a white guy, there are plenty of women (probably most of them) who exclusively date white guys. If I'm racist for wanting to marry a white girl, then it means 2/3 of American women are racist as well.

    • The racists part is you saying "She is black, so I don't want her!" That would be racist, no matter coming from a man or a woman. Preferences are okay, but: "I don't want a black baby!" is racist..

  • Did you get into a fight?

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  • I'm a white guy about to turn 30 in a couple of days. Only now am I starting to look for something serious my 20's were fun free my time and I was no where near mature enough to get married either. Now that I'm established and can provide for a wife and family I will start looking seriously

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  • either you settle with guy with low expectations or stay single and wait for the right guy you need, the choice is yours, and the last option is accepting the fact some people are meant to be alone forever

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What Girls Said 12

  • I say this to every person, who complains they always end up with douchebags.

    You're not going to like hearing this, but the majority of the blame is with you. You're in your late 20s and although you've been through a lot of men, ALL of them turned out to be dicks.

    If you remember basic math from school, the common denominator is what applies here.

    In all these failures the only thing in common is you.

    Something you do, the way you behave, the way you carry yourself, places you go to, where you find these men. I don't know what it is, but when you keep having the same problem happen year after year, there's a certain point in your life you need to stop and reflect on yourself.

    Sure, there are tonnes of assholes out there, but there are even more good people. If you've been failing at attracting boyfriend material for years, I can only assume YOU'RE doing something wrong.

    Ask your friends for some honest advice on why they think you're having these issues. They'll hesitate since they don't want to hurt your feelings, but if you swallow your pride and listen to them, you might discover something about yourself that requires a change.

    Whoever said it's your face is a dumbass. There are butt-ugly people in happy relationships everywhere you go. You don't have to be a model to get a partner, as long as you're healthy and have the right attitude, you'll be fine.

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    • "Sure, there are tons of assholes out there, but there are even more good people"

      That's like the first time I've ever heard such! You sound like an optimistic person, which is of course a good thing =D
      Sometimes we don't give people an opportunity because we're already expecting the worse in them.

    • This should be MHO. She nailed it.

    • @dipta

      Contrary to popular belief, I'm actually a very optimistic person. :P

      @chocolatedragon

      Thank you. :)

  • why do you say white guys hate you? your very beautiful and have the sexy figure most desired.
    go for an older wiser guy, most guys are still growing up at 30 and 40
    online date stuff is usually all games, a time sink
    you should think different on a deeper level, even consider to date other woman for the experience and mind expanding effect, or an Asian guy, live and work in another culture... just do not get stuck in your mind without deeper consideration.

    good luck <3

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    • Thanks but I have zero interest in women

    • I think you missed my point. I said "think different on a deeper level, even consider to date other woman" this is something you do alone, sitting out in nature or a beach... you do not need an interest, its simply to expand your mind, to see things in a different perspective.

      you know and i know that when a person is not constantly getting bombarded by amazing guys wanting to date us, that its our fault... we have a very bad attitude in how we think and react and misinterpret the information around us... and it shows, its ugly and common and unattractive in every way... physical beauty can not evoke honor or the love of a man, only the depth and wisdom of a skilled and stunning heart can do that.

      so if you want more than a low value to average men and you want good men, you must expand.

      its the same things if i said go get a double PhD degree and you saying you have zero interest in education.. its not about the education its about the freedom to have the life u want.

    • Ok I think I get what you are saying

  • You act as if you're fucking 50 years old... hello get a grip woman, you're just in a slump at the moment! It happens to us all. You get tired of dating because it's the same nonsense as always and start giving up. DON'T! But be happy with your single life and you will meet the person. Women who are happy with their lives become so much more attractive to men! You do have to get out of the house though and start meeting people, go to places where you have a bigger chance of meeting men that are open to serious contact. Maybe you make the mistake of going for the wrong type of guys. I see it happening all the time!

    And the guy saying it's because you're ugly, if I look outside i see many less attractive couples vs good looking couples walking around. So looks don't say ANYthing about the chances of being in a relationship. So it's definitely not your looks (I haven't seen any picture, but regardless) ;)

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  • All u can do is keep on keeping on. U could try to change your routine a bit and try to meet new people, being more open and perhaps joining a few groups, or online dating. But the best thing u can do is use this special time as a gift to better yourself

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  • the problem is you. not the men. you have high standarts I guess, and thats why you meet people who claim to be perfect but in reality aren't. become mrs right (like someone said before) and don't rush. i met my fiance under very weird circumences. never expected to ever be engaged

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  • 'Ladies you age' you sound 49. You are 29 for gods sake. When Im 29, I'll still be years away from having childen. Clam your tits--'

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    • Wow. At what age do you plan on starting a family?

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    • Haha, it's good you've plans and things to do in life. But well, like I said, still so far away, you just never know how things will turn out.
      Just take care and enjoy life as well, I guess! =)

  • I feel the same way. Although I am not concerned about not having kids. At the moment I don't want them, but if I met a man I love enough who does wants kids I would have them for him. I just won't be upset if I never have kids. I just feel that I am now 28 years old, and I have never ever had a relationship. I am still a virgin. I've only kissed two guys and that was when I was drunk. I hate family get togethers. I am always the only single person for Thanksgiving (which is in a couple weeks, I am Canadian) and Christmas and even some family birthdays. It always comes up about me being single by other family members. I always tell people that I am happy being and single and it's by choice. At one time it was true, but once I hit about 25 it actually started to really bug me. I just want to even be able to go on dates, even if it's nothing serious but no man is interested in me. I am so ugly. I work so hard on my appearance my staying thin, having good hygiene, wearing nice clothes, styling my hair, and on occasion, wearing makeup. However because my face isn't attractive at all, men act like I am some disgusting person. Anytime any of my friends introduce me to a guy their reactions are always basically: "Hell no!" and they don't even try to get to know me. I have never ever been on a date.

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  • Stop trying to find "Mr Right" and start making progress to become "Mrs Right". Guys do not like women with outrageously high standards, everyone is human, be more accepting. Then one day you may find a man who is close to perfect.

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  • You ever try dating within your race?
    White guys tend to go for white women and unfortunately men see black girl stereotypes and they assume we are all that way

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  • How I handle it well I don't want to get married as long as they like me I'm ok Lol but they don't either I just think it's their loss u. u

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  • Kick back with a bottle of scotch and be glad that you don't have any life sucking creatures hanging around you?

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  • My aunt is 40 with no kids , this year she got engaged , and she's happy, Its ok dont be sad , age is just a number , remember that. <3

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