How does a guy determine how low his standards should be?

Pretty simple question. I've had no luck at all with attracting girls in real life.. Is it time to go after ones I don't find cute? Does it mean you're ugly if you can't get a tinder match?


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Most Helpful Guy

What Girls Said 3

  • I can see your standards are based on physical attraction and looks ! you can't judge a book by it's cover ! going for the ones you don't think they're cute... that's not lowering your standards ! that's being brave enough to try things you never did before. going for the unknown :) you may be surprised ! I knew some very attractive people but after actually talking to them... the no longer have that charm , and people whom I never felt the slightest attraction became some of the most intriguing and fascinating people I've ever known... fell for some too !

    good luck and stay strong :D

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    • Well I mainly go for personality to be honest but it would be nice to have a girl I find cute as well as a bonus. I'm not saying I want a model or the best of the best out there. But do you think they could do better than me and wouldn't settle for my looks?

  • Never settle for second best!

    and if i could add "how low can you go? Can you go down low, all the way to the floor, don't stop" 💃🎵🎶

    (don't mind the last part, its a song) 😏

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    • But how do I find a girl I like if she never likes me back!! Gahh this is so frustrating :F

      lmao Cha Cha Slide?

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    • People are people.. I think more girls are into guys with awesome personalities, looks doesn't matter, or as they say "a bonus" (your average by the way)

    • But average isn't cute or handsome at all? Any do you say I'm only average? Could I be a 7 and sorta cute if I got a nose job? Average is pretty bad to hear from a cute girl :(

  • Try a different venue. Tinder isn't the top shelf of relationship material.

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    • Well real life ignores me. Is it really true that in average looking at best? :(

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    • Yeah but you can still tell if I have a good face or not, right?

    • You look like you'd do ok to me, just young :). Are you super shy? That holds a lot of people back. If so, practicing talking to new people can help.

What Guys Said 5

  • Many of these so called standards is made up by society and people are desperately trying to live up to those standards. Others try to find those standards appealing so they don't come off as some wierdo who doesn't like the current trends on how you should live a "successful" life or how your perfect mate should look like or behave.

    It's okay to have preferences in life. Just don't let others dictate what those should be.
    Desperation is what makes people lower their standards just like the lack of food will make people eat things they otherwise would consider disgusting if food was plentiful.

    If you are genuine with a strong sense of self you can avoid this desperation and avoid having to lower your standards/preferences.

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  • Here's a crazy idea: Maybe you aren't the problem. Maybe it's some of the girls and their ridiculous Leonardo Decaprio standards. Don't worry, there are girls who are friendly, kind, tolerant and won't judge you as harshly. It's just that the most beautiful girls tend to be the most superficial/materialistic ones. But it doesn't mean no cute girl will ever want to be with you. by the way I'm not gay but I think you look pretty normal. Maybe even above average.

    You can kind of tell just by looking at a woman. If she has a lot of make up and dresses really well she might expect a lot from guys because clearly she puts a lot of work into her own appearance. So beauty and fashion are clearly very important to her. But a girl with little to no make up that just dresses normally might be a much nicer person with better values. Of course this is a blatant generalisation and there are exceptions, but you get the idea.

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  • I don't think that you should lower your standards just to get someone. You won't be happy and it won't last long.

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  • Well if all you're worried about is matches on Tinder, you need to RAISE your standards. Get out into the real world!

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    • I don't know man, girls in the real world kind of ignore me.

    • You'll be rejected and ignored more than you will be accepted. But for every minute you waste online trying to find girls who could be hundreds of miles away, or complete bitches, a girl in the REAL world is passing you by.

    • Let me clarify, you'll be rejected and ignored in real life more than you'll be accepted. But when that real girl comes along, it will be worth it!

  • Never go into a relationship you do not want, never change your standards

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