Is it a turn off for a guy if I hate clubbing and bars?

I´m a social girl, I love dinner parties and barbeques or any daytime social gatherings, but I hate clubbing, going to dance or bars. I hate night life, as I don´t feel good around people who are drunk and men that are hitting on me.

I´m dating a guy who loves this stuff and goes out every Friday until 5 a. m. I´m afraid that once I will tell him I don´t like to do this, he will loose an interest in me..

Btw, what is so good about going to clubs? Is it always about getting laid?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I almost want to say don't become involved with someone that can't accept you for who you are, or that has completely different interests. Be yourself from the start. It's often tempting to pretend and force oneself, somehow hoping to later change the other person, but it doesn't work that way. Be the beautiful person you are, and if that's not compatible with him, move on. It's not really a case of there being something wrong with either of you; you're just different.

    Embrace The Difference :)

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    • i was already told to be a boring good girl.. i don´t know what to do to seem to be interesting to a man

    • ^^This, @CasualFriday. It's probably also the reason people are shy around their crush (guilty).

    • No, don't believe that. Each person is different and interesting. It might just be that you haven't fully discovered yourself yet, or that the men you hang out with are looking for something else. People differ in so many ways, and you can't please everyone. Learn to love and accept yourself. Radiate that inner beauty and confidence; I promise you there will be a man that finds you interesting.

What Guys Said 12

  • If he's doing this a lot chances are you aren't even really dating him and he's not your boyfriend. I personally have very low opinions of bars and clubs so if she told me she wasn't into them it'd be a turn on for me. For one, I don't have to worry about her being an alcoholic, becoming a DWI statistic, killing someone behind the wheel, doing drugs late at night until 5 am, cheating, etc.

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    • We had only two short coffee meetings, but tomorrow is hour first real date.

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    • No no no, those coffee dates were wonderful. He made me smile, I have never felt better before. We have lots in common. I really enjoyed those conversation, the only aspect I´m worried about is this clubbing.. :(

    • Good luck is really all I can say. I just really feel that you're gonna get hit with "one of those nights" that happened and cause a breakup over something "careless" he did.

  • It depends on your guy really, not all guys can say one or the other. Odds are you will eventually tell him and he will ultimately decide weather he likes that about you or doesn't like that about you. And if he feels that is the deciding factor on weather he wants to be with you or not. I doubt that is the case though, unless he has gad bad experiences with girls who dont like the night life as much as he does. In which case if you think he feels that way you will have to decide to keep playing the role until you can't take it anymore, or let him go without you. Which will probably get to you as well over time. Unless he feels he's doing cuz he thinks you like it in which case he could be hoping you get tired of it and tell him soon so he doesn't have to go any more :P

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  • I agree with you nothing more then a drug fest and getting drunk and trying tio get laid. I like a night life but I know clubs are not to good. Maybe you better think about telling him soon and if he has an Issue with it so what move on.

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  • I personally dislike clubbing and bars, but bars are alright with a group of friends. So for me it is not a turn off, but in today's society lots of people like going out for a drink or worse get wasted. So for those who take pleasure from those activities I guess a girl who dislikes it, is a turn off. In regards to your boyfriend, he might lose a little interest if he generally enjoys clubbing. Best to be honest, than continue in activities you do not enjoy.

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  • Wow, lots of club and bar haters in here. I've spent a good portion of my life in bars lol, just a social gathering place with drinks. I have a lot of friends who are into clubbing, they go for the music and to have a good time. I don't see anything wrong in that. As for your question he shouldn't have a problem with you not being into those things, and if it is then it would cause problems down the road anyway.

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    • He is a social and extroverted guy, so I understand that he likes to have fun. BUT I´m not sure if it means that he is looking for one night stands there.

    • I guess one way you could tell is if he listens to a lot of EDM at home and in the car. If he knows a bunch about popular DJs, guys that just go to clubs to pick up girls I'm guessing won't be as in to the culture. But I rarely go clubbing so I could be wrong.

  • I dont get at gurls who go to bars and clubbing. It basically means they go there to get in bed wif strangers >.>
    Not kool

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  • I don't know kinda, I like well rounded people who dont really "hate" anything. I dont love clubbing but it can be fun

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  • I my self was never in to clubbing or night life I don't really care for to talking to drunks I am in bed by 930 or 10 but for some guys it is turn off but older guys not really a turn off just depends on the guy I guess

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  • I hate clubbing and bars too, so no.

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  • It wouldn't bother me cuz I don't like it either

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  • Personally I've been told club girls are no good. So for a lot of guys it would be a plus.

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  • Not always the case. Some of us dudes don't go to clubs or bars and would just like to go to a restaurant or a peaceful date.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Loads of guys don't like going out. My partner isn't a big fan of going out, so I usually just go with my mates. But mostly him and I stay in together. It's nicer when you have a like minded partner... So maybe think about that...

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  • Clubbing i hate.. I like bars..

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