I come from a family that likes to keep it all in until it explodes on the other person. Obviously that doesn't work in successful relationships.
What do you do for your SO after you get in a fight to make things better again?
Most Helpful Girl
I take enough time away from him and the situation to cool down and get my mind straight. If I don't do this, we end up yelling at each other and once we're yelling it's all downhill from there. As soon as I yell he's not going to 'actually hear' another single world I say, his guard is up and he's in attack mode.
So I walk away, and when we can calmly TALK about the subject, we do, and by then he has calmed down too and is in more of a neutral/fix it phase. We can pretty much come to a solution or compromise rather quickly once in this mind frame.
After a fight or argument (by the way, every couple fights, EVERY couple, it's natural, it would be unnatural NOT to ever fight) it's time to apologize, accept your part in it, forgive and MOVE ON. It's an absolute huge no no to bring up crap that was swept under the rug long ago as ammo in a current situation. Let sleeping dogs lie. You don't do him or you or your relationship any favors by rehashing old shit.
Another tip, is to pick your battles wisely. Sometimes it is necessary to fight or argue, many time it is not. I ask myself the question, "Will this still bother me in two weeks?" If the answer is no, then LET IT GO! What is your end goal here? To nit pick him to death or til he's sick of it and you? Or to get along with him, have fun, have you be a safe/compassionate/relaxing place for him. Yea, the second one, right? I thought so. If it's something that will still bother you in 2 weeks, it's probably worth some words.0