He invited me to sleep on his couch?

We have been "friends" for 5 years now but nothing has ever physically happened between us. We went to graduate school together and now live in different cities. When either of us passes through the other's city, we meet up for drink.

A few months ago, he moved to a new city and invited me to come out for an event going on his city. We are friends but not really good friends... I don't know THAT much about him

I bought my ticket for the weekend to see him. He also invited me to stay at his place on his couch.
Guys: does he want more than friendship? Why invite me to his city? I don't know what to expect/think! Please help


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Most Helpful Guy

  • This could go any number of ways. Maybe he is only interested in you as a friend. Maybe you'll only get the couch, maybe when the time actually comes he'll say actually, you take the bed, I'll take the couch.

    If you're interested in something more, you could very very carefully see about getting an invitation to the bed. Play this really carefully when you see how he responds as to weather you sleep on top of the covers with a separate blanket or whatever. Once the lights are off and you're both resting and not talking (or if the talking becomes more subdued or personal) you could try rolling over and putting an arm across him, and see how he reacts. If I was the guy and a girl I liked did that, I'd probably pull her in closer, and turn my head towards her to check if she wanted to start kissing. If you don't get a good response to that, just back off for a while and see if you have an opportunity again. (I like snuggling in bed so it was fun writing that)

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    • I think you are right. I will see him this weekend and see what sort of energy he is sending out. We went to grad school together and I feel like he has always been buzzing around me. But we both were in relationships at different times. I think he is a bit shy. What signs should I watch for to see if he is into me? He acts a bit nervous/awkward when we grab drinks... that's a sign... right?

    • You'd need to explain better what 'nervous awkward when we grab drinks' means. What I would say is that if you're both having a few drinks you'll probably loosen up and that will make starting physical contact easier.

What Guys Said 7

  • Sounds like he just offered you a place to stay for the night because it was late and you were in another town. Rather than make you drive late or pay for a hotel, he offered his couch.
    He "might" want more, but nothing in what he said or did suggests that he wants more

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    • He invited me 3 months ago to come out and visit him for this event happening in his city. When I asked him on suggestions on places to stay, he said I could stay at his place on his couch.

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    • 5 hour drive from each other. We used to live a 9 hour drive

    • Meh. Still sounds like he was just helping you save money. If I invited a friend to my town to see me, I wouldn't ask him to get a hotel. I'd invite him to stay at my place. Otherwise he's asking you to spend a good bit of money just to see him for the evening

  • Accept the couch and don't pay for the hotel! It's all good.

    Buy him a nice bottle of alcohol or something to repay the favor.

    Friends don't let friends waste money!

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    • Haha

    • It's true! Like you, I tend to over think things so I'm trying to bring you back down to Earth.

      Believe me, if this dude wants you then things will get awkward at some point. That's when you leave and go to a hotel.

      Until then, save your bucks and enjoy your buddy's place!

  • There are way too many variables left out to give an accurate opinion, but my guess is that it's pretty innocent. Be sure to bring something in return for his hospitality.

    More importantly... do you want it to be more?

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    • i do want it to be more!

    • Be playful, be physical. Any excuse a situation gives you to be in (preferably skin) contact with him will be a huge boost, if he responds to that you're in.
      As they say, prepare to be disappointed but hope for the best.

  • lol Call me sexist, but I'd feel very weird about inviting a 'female friend' over to sleep on my couch.

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    • Ha. That's why I don't understand his intentions. After I booked the plane ticket to see him, he never said anything about staying with him. And after I texted him to see if he had suggestions on where to stay, he said I could stay on his couch.

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    • Ha. Is that what girls do? I am not very good a twirling my hair!!

    • Apparently. ; ) Also touching him. Can be done innocently. Very good indicator of interest.

  • Not enough info to tell whether he wants to date you or no, but I know he wants the booty.

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  • How do you feel about him?

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  • Yes he wants to be with you

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    • Why? Because guys don't invite girls to stay over if they are not interested?

    • He just is. It's simple. Does he want more than sex? I am not sure

What Girls Said 3

  • In my opinion, if he liked you he would've said sleep with him or he would've slept on the couch and gave you the bed. Him telling you to sleep on the couch screams "just friends".

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  • Ladies don't sleep on couches. Get yourself a hotel room and make it into a trip for yourself. Seeing him is just a plus

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  • Couch seems friendly to me. Nothing sexual about that

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