3rd date at his place or mine? Or neither?

[Anonymous]

So I met a guy online. He has a great personality, he's a few years older than I and he's successful. Exactly the type of guy I want to spend time with right now.

We've been on 2 dates. 1st was drinks at a really nice bar. We spent 5 hours together and had an amazing time. He followed the 3 day rule after that. But at exactly 72 hours after our date, he called. He actually called, which is unheard of nowadays. We talked. We determined that we can hold a good conversation in person and over the phone.

Met him for a second date exactly a week later. Went for dinner and one drink after that. Then we sat in the lounge in my apartment building and talked for an hour. He gave me a very short kiss before driving off that night.

We made plans to hang out the next weekend. We wanted to do something outdooors, maybe spend the day together and he would show me around since I'm new in town, but now it looks like it will be raining. So we discussed maybe watching a movie or binge watch Game of Thrones. Now if we end up going for GOT that would have to be at someone's house... Is that a good idea for a 3rd date? If so, should it be my place or his?

[SillyQuirks_]

I would say your place because he already knows where you live so it isn't like a secret anymore... & by having it at your house you have more control as too where in the apartment you explore. He isn't going to go into your bedroom unless you lead him there... Where as at his place, he could easily try and lead you to his bedroom and you may just be stuck in an uncomfortable position. :)

& if you really don't want things to end in the bedroom - you can not clean your room space so you have that in the back of your mind. lol

[Asker]

Good idea! But i recently moved into my apartment and it's not yet presentable to have a guy over... Plus my roommate will most likely be around and I would kind of like some privacy with him as well..

[SillyQuirks_]

Then just be prepared for the possibilities of what may happen going to his place. If you feel comfortable at this point in your relationship, then go for it. If you don't then go to the actual movie theater. I know that being with someone alone and binge watching shows sounds so much more appealing and fun but do what you feel is most comfortable for you. That is important. :) Maybe you can go to the movie theater and then decide to go back to his place.

[vmw2008]

Depends if you're ready for it to become more physical or not. Considering he's still following the rules of no-contact after dates, and only gave you a short kiss, I'd do something in public at least once more. Go to an actual movie theater. Suggest some new movie that's out that you "really want to see."

[Asker]

Thanks. I might end up doing this.. Even though i really do want to spend the day with him and have some alone time, i should probably wait once more right? But my other fear is, say i go to his place for the 4th date. Would he expect more than just kissing or making out at that point?

[vmw2008]

No, it's completely at your own pace. I'd say making out would be expected if there is attraction, but anything farther than that at your first "home" date is just wishful thinking on his part. Take it as slow as you need.

I just think one extra date away from home will give you more clarity as to his intentions. Many guys know about the 3rd date sex rule, and there's a chance he may be trying to cash in on that. You weed those guys out by avoiding the possibility of it and going a bit slower.

[meatballs21]

Sure, it's fine for the third date. Are you ready to accept making out or possibly more, because the potential will definitely be there when you have privacy like that.

Do it wherever you feel comfortable, or whoever has the bigger TV and nicer couch!

[Asker]

Thanks! Im pretty sure he has the bigger TV so it would probably make sense to go to his place. Im ok with the possibility of making out but nothing more.. that's what's bothering me..

[meatballs21]

Only let it go as far as you want it to. Guys will make moves and see how you respond. If you let him do something, he'll keep doing it and then try and go further. If he touches your boob, for example, and you don't want that yet, just gently move his hand away and somewhere else. If he doesn't get it, tell him to stop doing that. If he still doesn't get it, get up and leave. A good guy will respect that.