Asked her to dye her hair, was I wrong?

i asked my gf to dye her hair and do it like scarlet Johnson in the avengers. and she snapped at me "why do you want to change me, am i not pretty enough?" like i asked her for something weird. honestly i dont give a fuck about it, i just think she would look better with that haircut.

was i wrong to ask?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Girls get by saying this kind of thing to guys, but not the other way around. They do it all the time. You should grow a beard. You should do your hair differently. You should wear this or wear that. They will do this constantly. But the other way around is a no no. Girls are super insecure about their looks. Anything that even hints in the most vague way that something is wrong with their looks will land you in the doghouse. It's like tip toeing around because whatever you say will somehow be twisted around to be an insult.

    Your choices are either:
    Learn her boundaries really well so you know what you can get by with.
    Learn how to be super diplomatic
    Lie to her (girls will totally deny this, but if you can't do the first two then just lie and make your life easier)

    When it comes to girl's looks, just take any moral beliefs you have about lying and throw them out the window. Obviously that's not going to apply to all girls, but it's a very good rule of thumb until you find out otherwise.

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What Girls Said 8

  • Maybe not wrong to ask, but wrong in the way you asked and the way you approached her with that idea.
    If you are seriously only trying to help her look the best she can, and you think that the haircut will help then u really need to think through a way to slowly bring it up.
    I cnt exactly describe how to fix it but girls are very sensitive about how they look bcause evrywhere they go people judge them based on their looks. The first thing a guy notices about a girl is of course how she looks.
    Reassure her that u r only trying to help her look her best and tht u truly love her even if she doesn't like you advice or take your suggestion
    I love scarlett johanssen by the way

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    • i am more of asking her to change it for change not that she will look better or worse

  • You were wrong about the way you went about it. It sickens me how men are trying to mold their girlfriends into their "dream-girls". When you date someone you get what you pursued after...
    Now if you were just making a suggestion, then there is no harm in that. I am going to have to take her side this one though pal.

    "do it like scarlet Johnson in the avengers"

    How about if she asked you to:

    "do it like channing tatum in the vow" ?

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    • it was just a suggestion. and i referenced the scarlet because it shows what i am talking about.

  • its not cool! you make her feel insecure now

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  • she probably thinks you dont accept her the way she is and got butthurt over it. she kind of overreacted but you also couldve told her in a different way that wouldn't shoot her down. like if you said "you would look really good with the same hair color/style as scarlet johannson in the avengers" that way you aren't telling her to change and she has room to think about it

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  • Doesn't sound like a suggestion, it sounds more like a demand.

    This is no build-a-bitch workshop, you get what you're given and you don't throw a fit.

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  • You, sir must be new at relationships.

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  • It probably made her feel insecure like you didn't think she was good enough the way she is.

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  • It's hard having your partner tell you that you're not really good enough for them. Girls can be pretty sensitive to this.

    Also, telling people how to change their hair is starting to get controlling. I had an ex like that who started with hair and moved on to nearly everything else.

    Last, red can be hard to get just right in the salon.

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    • it was the black version of it.

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