How many people have you dated (and failed) so far?

Just curious what's the typical count before finally hitting the one? :D

I'm on my 2nd girl so far. I started dating only in my early 20s, so I'm still very new to the scene. My relationship with her doesn't seem to be holding up too well though. :/


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It was one guy and we were in a relationship for 2 years beforehand. People thought we were meant to be but that wasn't the case. I broke things off with him. About a few months back we tried to date again but I'm not really into the dating scene because I'm not all that experienced in the area. Yet, I gave it a shot twice with the same person. When I thought things were going well and even though I was interested (always have been with this guy)/seemed like he was too, rarely heard from him. So for my count, only one! :D As of now, I've moved on completely. Sure don't mind being single but it's not stopping me to go out and try to date again!

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    • Congrats on moving on! Dating exes always has this nagging feeling of doubt and unease, both sides are more unwilling to fully commit again so it's always harder than the 1st time round. Single life has its perks too!

      I'm dating an ex, but it was easier the second time round for me. Cause the 1st time, she wasn't fully in yet, she was too hesitant. Now, she's putting in a lot more effort into the relationship so it's much easier when 2 persons are mutually working hard.

    • You are right! The first time it was difficult because we were still young, trying to figure each other other out. He was more into me but I kind of pushed back which really didn't do us any good. The second time, we waited which we both have really matured, kind of having a bit of trouble figuring out of where we stand with each other. I think he's more laid back as to where I kind of hopped right into dating him again but not really paying attention because it felt like we had taken right off where we left it. When it's one sided, you can't help but pull back. You want it to work but I decided on moving forward is better for me. So it's good to hear when two people are putting in both the mutual effort to make it work! :) Good for you two! Well wishes and good luck to the both of you!

What Girls Said 28

  • two. I'm done with love for awhile.
    i just hope that its 3rd time lucky, because i dont wanna b that girl with a long history.

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  • Uh, depends on your definition of dating. I went on one day with a guy, and decided not to pursue things. Does that count as one?
    And then another guy I went on four dates with and then told him I wasn't feeling a romantic thing with him and asked if he'd be cool with being friends.
    So kinda two? Maybe?

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    • Uhhh, i guess the first one doesn't count haha. It's a date, but it's not dating, dating has a certain regularity to it I suppose.

      The second one is though. :) So one.

  • 1 failed relationship. I'm on my 2nd and probably last relationship. It's going gloriously.

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    • That's fabulous. ;) Hopefully that's the Mr. Right for you.

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    • Whoa. 7 years! That is a really really long time, I didn't expect to see such a number cause you know what they all say about the dating and marriage scene nowadays. I envy you. That means you two shared some of your childhood/teenage memories together (which is really one of the most amazing periods of one's life, really).

    • Well, thanks :) We work really hard to maintain the relationship. People are surprised when someone so young as myself spits out a number like 7 years.

  • How come?

    I lost number a year ago. Am single and eyeing him again. don't know if he is eyeing back though but he does flirt :P

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    • That sounds hopeful! :)

      Well she doesn't have the habit of replying texts and she's against calling. Sometimes I feel like I have to prove myself to her that I'm worthy. Just some stuff, I'll figure it out if it's too much for me at some point.

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    • Lol true. But I'm only seeing her next weekend, and I don't want to spoil the mood next weekend by bringing this up then.

  • About 100. Well maybe not exactly, but definitely too many. I was someone who felt bad when I said no... I also believed lines like "I will change" and "you are the only girl for me now". After being single for almost three years, I met the love of my life.

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    • You sound like you were too accommodating. >.< But it's great that you've found your man now.

  • Started seeing one dude when I was 16/17. That was my first serious relationship. I'm 25 now and we're married.
    So, one relationship.

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  • 4 guys and i'm on the 5th. Not including guys i've turned down and the number I became official with is different. I don't like thinking of it as a failure, if two people don't suit each and it doesn't work out then it doesn't work out and that's it.

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    • Good for you! I'm wary of breaking up, and of course, the girl doesn't want to break up either. So it's a pretty drawn out suffering near the end. :/

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    • I understand what you mean, when things are hard you don't want to throw it away when there's a chance it could still work. Keep working at it, you might find the way, but if you realize you can't then be strong enough to let it go.

    • Yups, thanks for your advice! >.<

  • Wow, i've been reading the numbers and im quite shocked, my number is high 😩 and its an unlucky number too 😭

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  • I've dated about 4 or 5 so far.

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  • 2 failed relationships. But that's not bad compared to the American average of 7-9.(before they get married)

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    • Yups, it's still good haha. Having a few failed relationships isn't too bad, it gives you experience and it tells you a lot about your emotions and how you handle relationships. But yea.. having too many failed relationships just makes one depressed and more willing to settle.

  • 3 failed relationships.

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    • Currently that's on par with average I suppose. :) It'd work out some day.

  • 2 failed ones, I'm on my 3rd and last (:

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    • congrats! Getting engaged soon haha? ;)

    • I have no clue. Haha our daughter is more important right meow^-^

    • Wait what, daughter? lol... I see it's already a done deed. :p

  • I've had 3 relationships and its funny because the shortest one (just over a month) was the best

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    • Sometimes weird things happen. :) The ones who's more compatible ones are the ones that fail. Huh.

    • Yeah, I think it was so good because it was easy, no fights, like we had things in common and we liked separate things but we didn't let the difference get in the way, we also didn't depend on talking to eachother every minute of the day

  • I haven't started yet.

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  • um a lot...

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  • If online dating doesn't count, then 1 person. We only dated for a month, but talked to each other for 2 months prior to that. We bumped heads quite a bit.

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    • At least it was short. Not much emotional investment lost. I had to end a relationship that was a year long - that was painful!

    • Those are the worst. Even though you shouldn't think about it like that, I think of it as time being wasted. At least with this guy I dated for a year, online. We only lived a few hours away from each other. I found out on my own that he didn't want to date me any more. Its just hard to get out of that habit of talking to and thinking of someone, when you've done it for so long.

    • I know right! I dated someone IRL online before. We chat very often and for very long sessions. It felt like every conversation would never end. But when we ended the relationship, our conversations get a bit awkward. We still chat, but I have to keep reminding myself not to make misunderstandings, not to let myself get drawn in again.

  • 1 actual relationship that was disastrous and 2 meehh just dating wouldn't really call it a relationship

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    • 1 then. Keep the disasters short haha.

    • haha yeah it was too bad i was with him for 2 years

  • 1 failed realationship (started at 14, the guy was terrified of being in a realationship) and im only 15 so I guess that's good.

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    • Nice! I don't know about dating so early, but I would have liked to date a girl when I was your age too, if only to get a female friend that would always be there to chat with me. ;)

  • Not familiar with the term 'dating'. Does having a coffee once with someone already count?

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    • Nope lol. That *might* be a coffee date, but it's not dating. Dating means regular dates, and the other party agreeing that it is a date too. Otherwise nope, it's still just "dates" not dating.

    • oic.. but after how many dates is it considered regular dating? 3? 5? 10?

  • My idea of actual dating has changed as have the guys. I'd say maybe 1.

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    • Sounds like you had a lot of semi-dates that weren't actually dates?

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    • Then he wasn't. Sometimes the guys do force the labels onto the girls, even though the relationship is hardly there yet to warrant a label. =.=

    • I never even met any of his friends.

  • Haven't had a relationship yet.. so I could maybe say just failed dates

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    • We try not to think about the ones that didn't work out. :)

  • I've only dated two people. I'm in my second relationship at the moment and it's going fairly well.

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    • That's good, all the best for you!

  • I've dated 3 guys

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    • That's nice. :) Thanks for sharing.

  • 18 and still very single lol

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    • Nothing magical really happens at 18 haha.

  • 2 amazing guys has come into my life. Now i enjoy being single.

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    • Single has its benefits. :) No one can hurt you. I'm sorry that those 2 amazing guys didn't stay in your life though.

  • I "dated" one person in middle school. (I think everyone gets to the point where middle school counts for nothing but embarrassment) My junior year I went to prom with a guy and we went on one date, but I don't consider that actually dating him. My sophomore year I dated a guy for a year and now we're dating again.

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    • Lol, my imaginations of what considered as dating was so horrendously naive back in middle school. Thankfully I never dated or it would have been emotionally scarring. :p

      And yea, going on one date doesn't count. It has got to be regular.

  • I don't see dating people as counts or a game until I reach a goal. Excuse me if I actually date people because I like them not as some type of numbers game. I do not date just to date

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    • I see, well I'm sorry you misunderstood though. I also only do date girls because I liked them. If you would believe, i spent over a year chasing my first girl, and for my second girl I was so wary that we went out 3 times over 1 year before I decided maybe we should officially start dating. ;) Although sadly, the long time frame spent dating means that it's really hard for me to end things even when I know it doesn't work out. :(

  • None and I'm 19 how pathetic right

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    • Nope. I didn't dare to ask any girl out either until I was 23. But anyway it's good to try dating, there's a lot of emotional things I didn't know until I had my first date. Which was disastrous by the way. ;)

    • I've tried lol no guys want me but oh well

What Guys Said 11

  • I started late too -- early 20s. So far I've dated several girls. 2 girls where there was a mutual interest and another 3 I gave a chance because I was seeing if their personality could win me over. But I've passed on more girls because I had no interest in them whatsoever. Anyway, all of them have ended in failure. Maybe there's one or two I'm forgetting but I think that's an accurate accounting. The last girl I was really, really into and she told me she just wanted to be friends. That was devastating so I've been passing up a lot of girls lately and am only recently getting back into the game. Right now I'm talking with a girl I think has potential but I wouldn't say we've hit the "dating" stage yet.

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    • Wow, sounds like you had a couple of close misses. :( Yeah it's really devastating when a girl says that. Especially when you thought you were starting to become best of friends, which would have been a wonderful thing. To make things worst, when I finally moved on, she started coming back and showing interest again. Urgh.

    • That's exactly what I had. You hit it on the head. You must've been something similar. The last girl made me rethink everything -- my approach, what I wanted, etc. So of course all kinds of girls have shown interest but I'm not eager to have a girl in my life right now.

  • 0... i only had sex with prostitutes

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    • Uhhh. Lol. On the other hand I'm still a virgin so oh well.

    • WHAT? you're 25 to 29 and still one? why that's weird?

  • hmm, I have had 1 relationship and it failed quickly, ever since I just give a damn about relationship. unless it gets in really deep

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  • I have dated a couple of times all long term usually lasting about half a year.

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  • If including just dating and nothing serious then 12.
    Official "girlfriends" 4

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  • I've dated over 13 girls. 2 serious ones that failed. Which hurts like a bitch :/

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    • Yeah it does.. :( Always hurts a lot. Is that your niece in your profile picture? :)

    • Mhmm.. When she grows up, i'mma be a scary uncle.. :/

  • 0 girls for me :(

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  • I am 20. Only been on 3 dates with 3 different girls. First 2 were not really my type. 3rd girl I liked a lot but she did not feel the same about me.

    I am still a kissless virgin

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    • Good that you've been both on the receiving and giving end of relationships. :) My only 2 were all on the giving end. And yes still kissless on my side too. Oh well.

    • Well if you look at my track record, the rejections far exceed any success.

    • We only need one success lol. Of course it'd exceed.

  • I've dated zero girls

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    • No stress, just mentally keep track of what's stopping you and work on way around it. :)

  • One girl, not looking for the second for a few years.

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    • Wait, a few years? You... don't think your current relationship going to work out?

    • Nah I'm afraid it WILL work out, but I'm too young, I haven't lived enough, and I'm not the best me I can be yet.

  • technically 6

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    • That's a bit on the high side, would you mind sharing your experiences haha?

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    • That's pretty ironic, to be too similar to be together. :( I think I would love to have such a girl though.
      And about being not good enough, I let that be the decision of the girls. If they still continued dating me, if they still showed interest, that meant regardless what doubts I had about myself i was still attractive to them. But yea, if I see them kinda tired of it all, I'll just break up too. :/

    • well atm id say youve done a lot better than me friend but what can i say im 17 early days yet :)

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