What should I do about this with my boyfriend?

My boyfriend has told me before that he is a natural flirt, and sometimes he can't help it. He often talks about other girls, how in the past they dumped him, how he doesn't give the time of day to some particular girls and how they don't have their head on the right path, and how previously if he wanted sex from girls, he could but chooses not to. He talks about girls at his work flirting with him and wanting him, but he claims they're not attractive and he doesn't want them. He's said before that girls want him once he's in a relationship and that all the girls would be jealous of him and I. Also I noticed the other day that he likes lots of girls photos on Instagram (I know it sounds immature) and I'm not particularly that angry, just a little annoyed. I do trust him. What should I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • So basically, he opened up to you, you got mad, and he shut down. congratulations... you just made an honest boyfriend begin to think that he has to lie to you to keep you happy. tbh its a popular problem. He never acted on it, he just told you what he observed, now you have put him in the zone to consider acting on it. You have basically triggered him to cheat. its not his fault others are attracted, plus he told you about it, plus he told you how he turns it down, plus he is with YOU, not them. Now he is either going to start lying to you, or considering moving to one of them. Congrats.

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    • Perhaps some sort of medication and psychoanalysis might be better suited to treat your issues, rather than posting bullshit on these forums.

    • @Unhyper I bet you I know more about psychology than you sir. But I am just talking out of experience and the existence of double standards. and yes i notice the age range. but bottle it down to the basics, he is doing what girls request and being put down for it. I have said that 100% honesty is one of the fastest ways to destroy a relationship, but girls keep asking for 100% honesty. Here is a guy with 100% honesty, which is rare, and what is she doing? She's putting him down.
      the way i see it, she can either ditch him for his honesty to go for a guy that will lie to her at the right times, or deal with the fact that she's lucky she has an open guy.

What Guys Said 3

  • This is dangerous for a long term relationship. The reason being if you are open to this behaviour, at some point he will meet some female who takes him up on the flirt and pushes hard. Then he may have serious problems , he may succumb and be fooled into fantasy land and screw up the lives of a whole bunch of people. This is how affairs start some way down the line. It's fun while you are single, but dangerous when you are in a relationship. Also he is not putting 100% into your relationship and this is not good for him, not good for you. Maybe he will wise up, grow up or whatever, but something has to change.

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  • I used to be kinda like that. But after a while you can teach yourself not to do that. I would be more annoyed probably with the pictures thing if my gf did that. His excuse it kinda lame but I would just reinforce how you don't like it and it's bothering you and ask he do his best to stop with the harmless flirting. It's actually pretty easy to do and he can just focus flirting with you.

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  • Tell him to be respectful, when talking about other girls. Like if his ex is flirting with him, all he needs to say is 1. My ex flirted with me. 2. I stopped it from going anywhere. 3. I just wanted you to know what happened.
    Anything else he can talk to his guy friends about. He doesn't have to tell you "Yea, this chick wants me and this chick wants me." Him bringing up every girl gives you reason to wonder what he would do if given the chance alone.

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What Girls Said 1

  • He sounds like a cocky player. I dont even know why he feels the need to tell you all this?

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