Guys can you give me advice for having the relationship talk with a guy?

I've been seeing him for over a year and a half but we aren't official. He tells me he loves me and thinks about me always. Tonight I am talking to him about being exclusive because its what I want. Do you have any advice on what to say, How to say it and when to bring it up? Before sex? After sex? Right away? He matters a lot to me and I want to be respectful and stay calm and cool. I don't want to make him anxious.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Why did you wait for this long? And if he confessed that he loves you, why din't you get into relationship? Im confused!

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    • We've been happy as we were but now i just want something more. I want to be exclusive which we haven't been and now it the time! We love each other so thats all there and we are comfortable. I think I just never wanted to push it cuz I've been happy but now I want a little bit more.

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    • I am being too good and understanding. Do you have any advice on how to have this talk? When to have it etc. How to stay calm if he doesn't want what i want? Do i leave him if he doesn't want to be exclusive?

    • look.. if you both really love each other a lot, he will definitely understand your feelings and things you tell him.. guys do respect their love and would do anything to keep it up and good.. you can ask him for hanging out and randomly take this topic..
      If he doesn't want to understand, ask him what makes him do that..
      Please don't take conclusive decisions and be mad at him.. be calm about things.. it'll surely work up.. never rush into anything, it could leave negative impacts which none of you want..
      Wish you best of luck.. hope you come out as a great couple :)

What Guys Said 2

  • Sure, write me and I will give you a good 'blow by blow' confession that may knock him off his feet and into your arms... exclusively.

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  • Tell him that a guy you know was hitting on you. And he wanted to take you out. And you found yourself considering it, because you never agreed you were dating exclusively.

    See how he feels about you going out on a date with this hypothetical guy he doesn't know.

    If he's okay with you seeing other people, then he's really not ready to be in a relationship with you and may be seeing other girls himself.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Just be honest and direct with him, tell him how much you love him, but you feel you are ready to take your relationship to the next level, and simply ask how he feels about it, if he is also ready to be more committed to you too. You have to ensure you are ready to hear the truth though , coz if he says he's not ready yet , itll be like getting hit with a brick. if you have been seeing him for that length of time, your own judgemnt of the relationship and how well you know him , will give you an idea of what to expect him to say. good luck

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  • After sex he will be more calm. I'm not sure if you bring it up if he will get mad or not. I think you should just tell him straight forward how you feel and that you want to be exclusive. See how he takes it. I dont see why he wouldn't want too after being with you for almost two years.!

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    • Thanks. I know that starting tough conversations immediately people put their guard up. I just want it to go as smoothly and calmly as possible. Im not trying to manipulate him the just getting to the truth. thanks!

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