Denied first date kiss?

I went on a date with this girl I worked with, it went well but at a point i asked her if i could kiss her she said no. At a point we were talking about it and I asked her about it, she said she would have rather I just went in for the kiss than ask her. I asked her if she would have kissed me back she said "no, i don't know" wondering whats going on?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • " i asked her if i could kiss her "
    I was just about to point this out is a big mistake, but then you say she also told you :
    "she said she would have rather I just went in for the kiss than ask her."

    ALWAYS remember that lesson. Stop being a fucking wuss with the girl. If the chemistry is right, lean in for the kiss. It's far better to apologise for misreading the signal than to kill the chemistry by asking if you can kiss her. Good grief.

    " I asked her if she would have kissed me back she said "no, i don't know""

    Of course she doesn't. She doesn't know, because she has no idea anymore what chemistry is between you, if any. Any pretence you had of convincing her that you were an attractive sexual man, is gone out of the window, because you're such a timid and confused little boy.

    The chances are actually pretty damn high that she would have kissed you back.
    Your timid actions threw everything she thought she knew about you into doubt.

    That's why she's confused. That's why she probably won't do a second date.

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 2

  • You don't ask things like that (on most girls), some girls might like it but most girls just want to see the man take action, making a move like that without asking shows confidence and if she rejects you then you could ask what's wrong or if she doesn't like you.

    See it as a lesson for next time, but for now.. I don't think anything is lost, she just said that she wanted you to just make the move. When you ask it somewhat kills the moment I think. Ask her out again, if she says yes you know you are on the right way :)

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  • There are two problems here, one is that she made this situation way more awkward than it should have been, two is that you can evaluate the reciprocation of the kissing request through non-verbal cues aka metacommunication. You can kinda read if she wants to be kissed or not. You should do that next time, because having to ask feels kinda clinical, and some people aren't really that great at handling that.

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