I still haven't figured him out and I really don't want to make a mistake. I'm going to briefly list traits about him, and you tell me what you think?

I'm a very introverted with people I haven't finished feeling out. It takes me a while to trust people, but I'll still befriend them whilst figuring them out. This guy who is into me has been VERY persistent with me over the years. He's told me I'm difficult but that he doesn't mind putting in the work. 4 years later, I'm finally becoming interested. But before I make a dumb decision, tell me what you think:

1. He's from a very wealthy family
2. He's vain and can be flashy
3. He takes pride in being a manly-man (brags about his beard, makes fun of less manly-men)
4. He's VERY sweet to me, and has never gotten mad at me for anything, even when I deserved it.
5. He's judgmental/critical of people. Lives life with strong values.
6. He told me he doesn't believe in marriage, and frowns down upon friends who get married too quickly.
7. He's been chasing me for over 4 years, and is very patient with me. Puts up with a lot of flakiness
8. He's loves art and cool unique stuff.
9. He has trust issues with people. Has few close friends, but knows A LOT of people.
10. He's a workaholic
11. Sometimes I think he lies to me to make himself appear more important. Actually, I'm almost positive he does...
12. I also think he lies to me to make ME feel more important.. but like I said, I'm a very wary/skeptical person with men.
13. It bothers me when he follows big boobed bimbos on social networks.. he never did that before until the last few months of knowing him... It's not my place to care, but I don't like guys like that. I like guys with standards...

I think I'm falling for him. Please don't bash me if I've said anything to personally offend you. I'm not leading him on to be a bitch. I've been hurt before and he scares me. Just give me honest input.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Pfff. He's better than me, i don't care who you are, i wouldn't wait that long for a girl to give me a response to being a couple. But seriously 4 years, that long. Maybe he's looking at social networks for the BIG CHESTED BIMBO'S *meant with complete sarcasm* because he is now also looking for other candidates and your time is running out.

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    • Noooooo what should I do? They're definitely hotter than me... But not by much.. I just need a boob job lol (kidding)... but seriously...

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    • Wow I can only come up with one thing. You been making him wait because you don't know how he really feels about you. Uf you were one of those gold digger types than you would have been dating him a while ago in hopes that one day you will convince him to marry. I already know in cases where you are dating for seven years and living together for throughout that time you are still entitled to alimony as if you were actually married. But you didn't you've stayed close, even as friends it seems but never gave into him. Now some people might say men like that are doing it because its something they can't have. But i don't think so, business men are rational thinkers and investors. I do not see wasting my time on a girl whom is just a piece of ass longer than lets say a couple of days. Because with him if he wanted to, he could probably hang out in an elite club and find a girl who will throw themselves at him. May even sleep with him that night. Thats not what he wants.

    • Ah ok. This makes a lot of sense. Very helpful info, thank you. I'm excited to give this a shot. And if it doesn't work out, fuck it!

What Guys Said 3

  • Personally I see a lot of red flags.
    He doesn't want to get married? So he doesn't want to be committed to you.
    Has trust issues? That is part of a relationship trust.
    Workaholics? Meaning your not important, when it comes to a future family.
    He doesn't trust people, and you don't trust guys because you've been burned. I understand your reason more. My little sister has been burned as well by a couple of guys, and as her big brother I do what I can to help. But still these traits spell trouble for the future. Just to let you know there are good men out there that you can trust, that won't miss treat you and love you.
    Well you yourself need to have high standards as well. What are you looking for in a man? What is a relationship about?
    Personally you aren't going to like my answer, I say if he isn't going to work on these issues then I would dump him.

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    • I can't dump him lol I'm not with him. Not even close. He's just been pursuing me for the last 4 years and he's starting to finally wear me down. But I do appreciate the input. Do you think he's just chasing me for other reasons?

    • If there is a reason I am unsure what it is. I don't know the guy. My question for you is do you have any older brothers or close male friends? Have you talked to your father or uncle about this?

  • If you don't mind my saying, I think you sound a tad judgmental. He doesn't sound perfect (a few things about him are off-putting in my book), but who is?

    If you know he likes you, and you now like him, where's the problem? Go find out if there's a future for it.

    You're in a lucky position. Some of us have no one who is after us, let alone wait 4 years for us. Some of us are suffering unrequited love. Go test the water!

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    • After re-reading myself, you're right :/
      I do sound overly critical.. It's just me being insecure. To be honest, I think what it really is, is that I can't believe someone like this is really interested in me. I'm gonna give it a shot, but I'm gonna get my ducks in order first. I don't want to mess this one up like I have with all the other ones. Thank you :)

    • Just enjoy it. Have fun. It's s long backstory but what that means is you kinda know one another. you could argue you can't mess it up because the hard part is over.

      Good luck!

  • birgün bir bakarsın güneş açmış,,

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What Girls Said 2

  • Ugh. Too much. Find a simple man cause this guy makes ya want to puke just reading about all his neediness and drama.. da fuq 0. o

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    • Lol at what point in his description did you want to puke? The part about him sticking around for 4 years? I'm not so sure that it's a bad thing for me.. Lets hear your thoughts though

    • The part where he thinks his family money has anything to do with his worth as a human being? I would rather date a broke guy who worked for his own shit and was proud of it.. even if he made 1 penny/hour than some douche who things his grandfather's money makes him more important than he actually is... ew.

    • thinks oops

  • He's a human rubik's cube.

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    • Lol wait really? Or being sarcastic. Elaborate please?

    • I'm being sarcastic. He sounds like a normal multifaceted individual, but the part you mentioned about him lying to you, is a little sketchy. If you're a believer and you pray, then pray about it. It's all gonna come down to following your intuition. If it doesn't feel right, chances are it's not for you. Of course you don't base your decision solely on feelings but, you take into account what are red flags and deal breakers for you. If there are too many, then find a loophole and escape.

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