Why is it that guys are expected to make the first move?

Please respond to the above question and answer the following poll;
Guys and girls, do you like to make the first move or do you prefer the opposite sex to do that? and why?

  • Make the moves myself
    37% (7)65% (15)52% (22)Vote
  • Let the other make the moves
    63% (12)35% (8)48% (20)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

0|0
10|9

Most Helpful Girl

  • This is part of the traditionalism and gender roles. Men are expected to be aggressors. So while women are expected to sit and be passive, men are expected to make moves and be aggressive. I do not agree with this and don't think a penis or vagina comes with expected roles for that gender. Are feminists crazy for wanting gender roles to be removed now?

    I think it's better for people to just state if they like someone. Male or female. And if you don't make the moves, you have no right to complain about being single cuz you're not doing anything about it. Male or female.

    1|1
    0|1

What Girls Said 9

  • I don't expect them to make the first move, some girls have the courage to do so and i applaud them for it.
    for myself, I dont have the courage, for fear of rejection

    1|2
    0|0
  • I usually let my guy lead the way, just because we are usually thinking the same thing at the same time. So it works for us. If I'm in the mood, though, I'll make the first move.

    0|0
    0|0
  • The guy should make the first move because as sad as this may sound, depending on the person's surroundings, when a girl makes the move she's gossiped about but when I guy makes the move first everyone cheers him on.

    0|0
    0|2
    • really? have you experienced that before?

    • Show All
    • You know, there's a chance she'll become interested after you ask her even if she's not interested at first. Girls don't forget when things like that happen. She thinks about the moment, and if you're lucky you'll slowly enter her heart.

    • well thats certainly an interesting line to take

  • I find it really attractive when the guy makes the first move... takes such guts!

    0|0
    0|0
    • so you admire the confidence?

    • Show All
    • Not always, I can tell by their body language

    • that statement has now only made me 10 times more uncomfortable thinking about making the first move :')

  • I dont really agree with gender rolls. But if someone decides to make a move before me, I'm okay with that.

    0|0
    0|1
  • Guys are expected to because it shows us girls that you had the cojones to do so. Somebody has to do it or nothing will ever happen. Now if the guy doesn't tell me how he feels and I get tired of waiting, i'll just tell him how I feel.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It's a traditional thing that's continued on. Most of the time it's been the guy coming up to me, giving a compliment or letting me know he's interested, and then asking me out if I reciprocate. What counts as a first move, though? I've asked out a few guys, but I've also approached a guy, started a conversation, flirted, etc. and then he'll ask me out. Just wondering if that counts as a first move, because then I've made more of them than I think, lol.

    0|0
    0|0
    • yeah i would count the examples you gave. see there you go girls, its not a shameful thing to do

  • I've seen lots of opinions (from guys) on GAG that a guy gets turned off when a girl makes the first move. It really discourages me since I don't know the preference just from their appearance :/ It is safer to wait for guys to make the first move.

    1|0
    0|3
    • ignore them, dont let them discourage you from acting on your feelings. i think that is very unfair on you and your possible male boyfriends.

    • Show All
    • I don't know... Wouldn't I look like I'm throwing myself at the person?
      Lol then welcome to our world. Not trying to be mean but just think of how difficult it is for us. If a guy says no to you, it's most likely because he's not into you and that would make you feel like an unwanted piece of crap not that you are I'm sure your the epitome of hotness... but that's my point if you can't handle what people may think of you, then imagine that aswell as the fear of rejection and hatred towards yourself. You have to admit. Girls have it easy and it's so much more difficult in England cause girls here boring and very difficult to pickup they want to know someone for years before you can even think of asking them out.

    • im not sure if girls have it easier in general, but in this case i agree. i also like to build friendships before i make a move, but that makes the fall even greater afterwards

  • Depends how I'm feeling. Usually I'll let the guy make the move because I know guys love the chase.

    0|0
    0|2
    • i hate the chase haha, but thank you for replying :) my apologies for not including an indifference option

    • Show All
    • I would sing praises if a girl showed interest in me and made the first move. There is so much pressure for guys from society to make that first move. And besides I find the chase ridiculous. Either you like us or you don't, don't make it a huge roller coaster

    • exactly, why must there be a chase in the first place? i hate the whole hinting and flirting routine. it jut leads to uncertainty

What Guys Said 9

  • I would prefer it if girls made the first move. I mean, which guy wouldn't like girls fawning over him?

    But in reality, no girl likes me enough to do that. I have to make the first move myself, or I'd never be able to go out with any girl.

    Why guys have to make the first move, is because of stereotypes. We're supposed to be bold, brave, courageous. We have to make the first move to demonstrate that we are worthy of the girl. And this description fits more than half of the male population, so it's become expected of us.

    0|0
    0|0
    • line 1, agree completely
      line 2, im right there with you buddy
      final paragraph. unfortunately that sounds right. i mean unfortunately for you and i that is

    • Show All
    • So yeah, making the first move... isn't too stressful. Just get over the first step and worry how to continue later, that's the tough and depressing part haha.

    • oh jesus so i haven't even reached the hard part >:( haha

  • The whole "guy is supposed to make the first move" thing is just part of the gender role. That is changing in todays day in age, now we have women who bring in income and have stay at home dads, rolls are starting to reverse in some ways. So they may reverse in this way as well. But who knows. I personally think I guy should be strong and confident enough to protect his woman and hence make the first move if he pleases but there is nothing wrong at all with a woman making the first move either, it's happened to me a lot. I think everyone has a slight fear about making the first move because you are the one that get's rejected if they say no.

    0|0
    0|0
    • yeah thats right. people who make moves are the people who somewhow see past that

  • I've only been approached first by older or married women. I've typically always made the first move though. Not for traditional reasons or anything, just because I go for what I want and hate missed opportunities.

    0|1
    0|0
    • so thats just you taking matters into your own hands, fair enough. thank you for replying :)

  • For one, most girls don't have the guts or the need to make the first move.

    For two, pussies don't make first moves. ;)

    1|0
    0|0
    • My response to one. Why dont they need to?
      My response to two. you are now the second person to make that pun haha

    • Show All
    • They're not using a smart strategy. Unless you're a top dog, making a first move is the smart play when dating.

    • interesting. this is all assuming that the other person is into you too

  • As a shy guy I would love if the girl made the move.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I've been apporached by women a few times. it catches me off gaurd and i dont know how to act sometimes... casue i m the one whos always appraoching.

    i think its better i do it becasue women can come off like a free fuck

    0|0
    0|0
    • hmm, maybe thats another stereotype amongst society. one we need to remove

    • Show All
    • interesting, well thank you for sharing that, its quite the avenue

    • no problem bud

  • It show's that you are not a pussy and that you pursue what you want with confidence.

    0|0
    0|0
    • so i take it you said you prefer to make the move?

    • I did. A beautiful woman will have many options. You have to make yourself stand out and do what others don't have the balls to do if you want to make her yours. That doesn't mean women haven't approached me as well, it's just my nature to go for what I want.

    • respect. and well said i suppose.

  • Have to girls expect it

    0|0
    0|0
  • I just think of how hard it is for guys to talk to a girl, and I realize it's even harder for girls.
    Because they're pussies, get it? ... No... OK
    I'm OK with making the first moves as long as girls at least appreciate it.
    Some girl told me I made her day today, because I called her pretty. She was much prettier than the image below btw.
    But some girls are bitches
    www.thestar.com/.../....jpg.size.xxlarge.promo.jpg
    Don't deserve compliments.

    0|1
    1|0
    • hahaha oh i got it :') interesting point yes. i think girls and guys should take admiration generously and not snub

Loading...