Why are girls so restricted when talking to guys? (details below)?

look why are girls so retricted when you try to speak to them. Personally im open minded im the kinda guy that can talk about anything anywhere thats just how i am. when i talk to girls i want them to open up and so how do you go about doing that? When i talk to girls i say hey first and than ask for there opinion on a topic than ask them what theyre plans are on that day or what they do for a living. Would girls find that creepy if a random dude like me approached them in a train and started talking like that? and would it be alright to ask for her number afterwards so i could ask her out? or is that weird too? how do i get girls to open up and feel comfortable?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • For me, I think it's fine but if you were a stranger i would definitely be restricted too. I'm just not comfortable with strangers knowing my business, i mean you could be a serial killer for all i know. I would probably take you're number and contemplate whether i will call you or not for ages and most likely not if you asked super intrusive questions like the exact place i'm going right now or where i live. However if you were a guy i knew and had already talked to, you're question wouldn't be the least bit creepy. :)

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    • But thats the thing im trying to get to know you. there's only so much questions i can ask without sounding weird or intrusive when really ijlm trying to be friendly or get you on a date without sounding like a creep. Its always in mind that from one question i can sound awkward, weird or a creep when all i want to do is be a friend. I just want to be a friend how do i get to that stage from being a stranger thats my challenge.

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    • nice you've taught me well :). Congratulations you are the most helpful and may god bless you.

    • Hahaha thank you! May God bless you too! Had a good chat, glad I could help :)

What Girls Said 6

  • I don't know why we are so restricted. But I notice myself doing it a lot to strangers. Try not to come on too strong. Like instead of asking questions and trying to get her to instantly talk to you, start off slow. Don't expect her to open up a lot the first time you talk.

    Maybe just give her a compliment first, "Hey, I like your shoes". Or maybe just a general statement when you first get on the train or something "Holy shit, it's freezing out there".

    And then see how she reacts to that. If she smiles or says something back (that's more than a one word answer) then try slowly moving into conversation. Try not to ask too many questions. Especially personalized ones. Keep the conversation light and don't interrogate her. Try to be funny.

    If you succeed in having a conversation and she seems to be enjoying your company than ask something like, "hey, would you be down to grab coffee with me sometime? There's this new cafe I've been wanting to try". And if she agrees, ask for her number and tell her you'll text her later that day.

    I think that should work. At least it would work on me, haha. Good luck :)

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    • I understand i should ask open ended questions. you know what here's a list of questions id typically ask a random girl too you tell me if it would work or not.
      Hey.
      Hows your day?
      what do your work as?
      Summers coming up do you like the beach?
      Do you study?
      what do you study?

      what do you think is there anything else i can add?

    • Try not to ask that many questions unless she seems interested.. Like dont just sit next to someone and be like "hey, how's your day?" Because that's going to seem weird. Try using the stuff I said in my original comment

    • yea im getting better at using open ended questions. i feel though its my duty to control the conversation or there will be an awkward silence. i think by asking questions prevents that and shows that im curious. is questioning her though the only way to keep the conversation flowing while also getting to know her?

  • I'm very open when talking to guys, and basically everyone who wants to chat.

    I can talk about anything and not feel awkward about it. Also, I have nothing to hide.

    You see, it depends on the female and what she's comfortable talking about

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    • you see this is the type of girl i like. we can talk about anything. you dont take things too seriously and you're not too judgemental. thats the type of person i like but i hate that i have to weary and feel that im treading on a thin line to being determined a weirdo or creep. more girls should be like you :)

    • ;) yeah im pretty chill.. & i hate avoiding any type of conversaton and thanks.

      though my opinion isn't very biased :/ that's why you picked another question as most helpful 😂 hahaha

    • im not sure what u meant by biased but im just wondering how to approch and the what to do and the what not to do after i say hey? if i wanted to make friends.

  • I don't tell strangers personal info about me bc I don't know u or your intentions. you can ask for my number tho but I probably won't tell u where I work or my full name during the first convo

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    • then how do we become friends if you dont open up? im tryna get to know you and make conversation but that takes two. i dont mean no harm either so how could get know each other personally without personal info?

  • Well not me I'm open and like to talk to people. I might be shy at first but be careful what you ask for with me I will talk until I lose my voice if I could. Depending on the person it has to be back and forth I can't be doing all the talking now. lol

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    • you see i like that. we can talk about all kinda random topics without thinking one of us is weird. i can talk from night till the morning. well done sammy there should be more girls like you.

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    • you are not weird in fact you are amazing and i absolutely love peoole like you. I find that where ever i am i want to get to know people its in my nature. no matter who you are i find everybody wants someone to talk to and we shouldn't label people weird or strange because its those different things that make everybody special. im glad we can see eye to eye if i could give you mho i would may god bless your beautiful soul and dont let anybody change who you are :)

    • Thank you OMG the nicest thing I've heard in a while, it really means a lot thanks :) Likewise

  • they just have to connect with you, I don't think that's weird, because I've had convos like that with random guys before, but if after the convo, I didn't feel a connection, I would just say, nice meeting you, have a good day and leave it at that, I wouldn't give him my number, but if I felt a connection, I would, so it's really just a matter of how connected she felt with you during the convo. it's not creepy or weird. at least, not to me.

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    • Thank you, and i do believe connection is very important. however to build a rapport is tricky when building a relationship. I feel its important be bond but how do you do it and then more importantly how do you continue?

    • how do you do it? it's really just chemistry, engaging with them in a way they feel welcomed and not bothered. it just comes down to their personality and yours, if you guys mesh, it'll happen naturally and you can then continue, if not, then you guys will walk away and go on with your separate ways. no harm done.

  • It depends on what type of girl they r. Girls have different opinion on how things r and also becus of how society these days; with all the pervert, stalkers, rapists etc girls put up a wall or something and dont let other people in so easily? im really not saying your'e a perv or anything ! please dont misunderstand. And you can get girls to open up by not rushing things and just really have a normal nice convo dont see anything wrong with tht ^^

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    • The problem i have is going from a stranger to a friend. What is it that will allow me to build this relationship from scratch like talking to a random girl on a train. Do i ask them for coffee or there number or walk them to there job or is that too far cause it seams the more curious a guy gets about a girl the more creepy he is or stalker-like or pecert-like or rapist-like he is. Is walking them a bad idea?

    • If you guys get along there's no problem walking her to her job i would find tht cute and also it would give u guys time to find out more about each other ~

    • yea but we gotta be comfortable with that first. i wonder whats appropriate to ask say a random girl on the train for the first time or a girl walking the streets?

What Guys Said 3

  • Next time, ask her questions that require more than one-word responses. If she tells you what she does for a living, ask her something like: What are 3 things you need to be in order to be good at your job?

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    • i dont want to bore her either asking what she does for fun and other questions might seam like a better choice

  • Good question reading the posts now I'm starting to see why it took me weeks to get this girl to know I am not another creepo at the downtown district.

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    • no worries im tryna understand as well.

  • I like sammy's opinion. That is all.

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