What's his deal? Does he like me or is he confused?

So there's this guy and he really confuses me. I know he likes me because he's mentioned it a million times, but its weird cause he doesn't act like it often. Like sometimes (mostly when drunk) he'll say nice things, and flirt over text but he has days when he's very aloof and off. We've already cuddled and kissed at his place and he says how he wants to do it again but he hasn't set a planned day or invited me over for a while.

When I compliment him he says nothing back, is this a red flag? and could he have changed his mind about liking me?

He'll sometimes start conversations by saying "I'm gonna do *insert thing here* so you like me more"

or something like "would you still kiss me if *insert here*"

Someone explain lol


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What Guys Said 2

  • There are two potential things at play here.

    1) He has low self-esteem. In this, he's just not confident enough in himself to know what the next move is or should be. He likely has lots of ideas but fears that none of them are good enough.
    2) He's playing a few women at a time. In this, his communication is scattered because he needs to keep different women hanging on. If he all of a sudden makes time for you and says the right things, this is what it was all along.

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    • Hmm, makes sense. He seems like more of the "relationship" kind of guy. But I could be wrong. Thanks for your input!

    • I think your gut is right so go with it. I was merely speaking from a relationship coaching perspective. I've seen both sides.

  • Sounds like low self-esteem.

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    • Is he not sure that I like him? so he acts like he doesn't like me?

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    • Its not like I do it in a mean way, but yeah I guess you're right. I'm just afraid he lost feelings for me.

    • He hasn't.

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