Guy who wants to date me never pays for anything. Should I stop seeing him?

So, I've known this guy since high school. Two years ago, we went to a birthday party together and I ended up buying him a drink. Then a few weeks later, he asked me to help him out with learning a new language (I'm a native speaker of that particular language) so I ageed and taught him for a few hours. On the day, I bought him a coffee and he said he would buy me something too 'another time'

Anyway, fast forward two years and he asked me out. On our past dates, he has never offered to pay for anything. He will always jump in front of me and buy himself something.

The last time I saw him, he said I could buy him sushi which made me kind of mad, but I didn't say anything.

I know that I shouldn't expect someone to pay for me and I always pay my own half, but he seems a bit like a moocher, never even offering - besides I've paid for him in the past. His behaviour has turned me off him a bit and I'm unsure whether I want to date him.

Would you keep dating someone, who acts this way?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • if that's enough to turn you off then just hit the pass button.

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What Guys Said 8

  • get rid of him, he sounds like a hanger on, a user. You have paid for him, and he has never returned the favour. Say goodbye to him. Saying goes, fool me once, your fault, fool me twice, my fault.

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  • If he's already fine with having you provide for him, then that will never, ever end. Are you okay with things going all the way with him? Marriage? Are you fine with being the breadwinner and letting him be, worst case: unemployed? That's how it will be.

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  • If he buys his own that's ok but if he's expecting u to buy yours and his then dump the prick

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  • I would stop seeing him. Prissue guy...

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  • go to an expensive restaurant, order a pricey meal and leave before him
    he's a jerk, seriously

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  • Wow, shameless freeloader. Not good for you, next.

    Every time I bring someone to a bar or restaurant, I feel it's implied I am paying. Unless I say "I feel like _____, wanna go and eachbpays their own?".

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  • Well personally I would like to pay for the woman I'm seeing, but with it's never really been a requirement for guys to pay for the girl. That being said he should at least be paying for himself, that looks to be quite selfish in my eyes

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  • Imagine if a guy said this, he would be called a pussy.

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What Girls Said 4

  • I wouldn't keep dating him.
    If you are curious to see if this goes anywhere at all you should send him a message next time he asks to see you, reply with - "I will let you take me on a date. ;)" That implies he is paying.
    Something along those lines as far as wording is concerned. Make a point that he is taking you and put the winky face to create a flirtatious atmosphere.

    You are a prize and you need to value yourself that way for him to as well. If he doesn't see you as a prize, he won't work for you.

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    • Well, on the past few dates he's always distanced himself from me when buying something (e. g. ticket, drinks etc). We even went to the cinema and he was like 'You can pay me on the day'..

    • Yeah I would cut it then. lol What in the world. That isn't a date... that sounds more like two friends hanging out. He hasn't done anything the treat you and you are treating him with one, your company and two, but paying occasionally for him.

  • I've given guys like him a chance before, and trust me they'll never pay for anything. He's using you and just wants a girl to pay for everything. It ends up hurting you because not only does this guy not love you or have feelings for you, but he's using you.

    Trust me end it now while you can. This will only affect your self esteem in the end and make you feel horrible.

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    • I know.. and even the last time he was like 'Okay, you're paying for sushi next time' which made me really mad.

    • Yeah it makes me really angry when guys ask me to pay for things. A lot of guys do this and I'm not sure why. It's frustrating.

  • Well make a point of splitting everything from this moment onwards, and if he asks tell him straight: I don't expect a man to pay for me but if you think I'm paying for you then you're very much mistaken! Besides, you still owe me that coffee you promised me.

    Don't let him think it's cool.

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    • Exactly.. plus, the last time he saw me he mentioned that I would be paying for sushi the next time.. I always pay for myself and never expect a guy to pay, but I have paid in the past and he could at least offer once.

    • Yeah I'd make a running joke of his penchant for not paying. See if he's just messing bout and joking or actually serious.

  • he sounds cheap! which is a turn off for me! stop seeing him...

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