Why is it that every girl I take interest in is already in a relationship?

Now calm down, if I knew they were in a relationship I would not get interested. And it is funny because, these girls do like me, at least they act like it and they tell me they do, but they are just not available.

It just seems that, for the last year or so, any girl I actually liked and wanted to date said they really liked me, but they are already seeing someone else. I almost broke up a relationship because I asked a girl out who (unknowingly) had a boyfriend, you would think she would have mentioned it after a month or so of heavy flirting!

Anyway, I think I am just cursed, I am not even being rejected per say, just for what ever reason the girls I ask out and actually like are taken.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Because you know what a good girl looks like. But others figured it out first.

    And side note, girls in relationships often forget that single guys are interested and what guys perceive as flirting is just the girl being nice.

    • Yes I suppose that all makes sense. The last part sucks, but what can you do.


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What Girls Said 4

  • How do they show interest in you? What signs are you picking up? & what is "flirting" as far as how they act towards you?

    • Texting a lot, in a very teasing way, not sexting but close? one on one movie nights (only with two girls)? general playful touching? dancing (like dirty)?

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    • It is a lot better than the feelings and reaction to finding out down the road in the relationship that she is actually dating someone and you avoid friend zoning yourself.

    • Thanks ladies for the comments. I guess I just take a little time to figure out if I actually like a girl enough to ask her out or not. And I do always make sure it is clear it is a date (except those times where I mentioned about the movies, big mistake). I guess I just know that if I had a girlfriend, I would subtly drop it if I felt a girl was coming on to me in anyway. It does not have to be super obvious, so as to seem weird if they are in fact not interested.

  • Well the good news is, that you would have just ended up with a shady chick who leads people on while she has a bf. You dodged a bullet.

    Can't really give you a reason why but don't let it discourage you too much.

    • Ya I just commented somewhere else on this, once I found out they had been with someone else and flirting as heavily as they had been, I lost loads of respect and interest for them. Thanks for the support, but it does get tiresome and a "why I am I even trying, I am sure she is already taken". But try I will.

  • Because the desirable ones already have boyfriends... sounds like you need to get in line sorry

    • I just feel like at this point I would have hit at least one single girl... 22 is way too soon to have all the "desirable ones" taken

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    • Never lower standards (not that I a think I am anything special and have high standards or anything), I just want the basics, someone I think is cute, funny and not crazy. Not a lot to ask for, is it?

    • Nope but you also have to be cute, funny and not crazy to get a girl like that:)

  • well don't be hopeless i'm sure u will find a nice girl whose actually single :)


What Guys Said 1

  • I've found that all the best ones have been taken recently. Sucks don't it?

    • Ya man, I am 22, I think that is waaaay to early to feel like all the good ones are taken.

    • I don't mean to say that I think the situation is hopeless, it's just been recently. It's just a bit frustrating that the last few girls I've met who've been perfect have also been taken. I've known they were taken early on but had to work closely with them, getting to know them and how awesome they are, all the while knowing they are off limits. Shit! lol

    • Ya I have been in that boat as well. Like they are perfect, and you have to interact with them, and so you naturally like this person, even if you would never do anything to hurt their relationship.

      And I guess I would take this over straight out rejection any day! At least I know I am a likable guy, but it does start to pick up a tone of "I am sure she is taken, why even try", but I guess I still always try...