Went on a first date w a guy and he mentioned his exes a few times. Is that bad?

He mentioned some of them a few times, mostly in the context of why they broke up. Is that a bad thing? One of the girls is a girl I used to be friends with and they broke up maybe three years ago so that's the reason why she was relevant bc I wanted to make sure it wasn't awkward still.
If a guy talks about his exes does it mean he's not over them or something bad? We talked about loads of other stuff as well, I just didn't know what to make of it.


Most Helpful Guy

  • It doesn't necessarily mean that he's not over them, no. It could just mean that he missed the memo; nobody ever told him that talking about exes is kinda, well... yucky. LOL

    • Yeah. I felt kinda awkward aha. Hopefully its just social ineptness rather than something else bad

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    • ooh by the way he mentioned one of them again by text and I sort of said are you not over them is that why your bringing them up? And he said he's 100% past it, he just speaks without thinking and apologised if it made it awkward for me. He said he's looking to the future. Do you think it sounds like things are fine then?

    • Yeah I think that sounds fine. He could have genuinely been unaware that it was a faux pas to talk about exes. I think you did the right thing by sort of challenging him on it, because it lets you voice your opinion and it also gives him a chance to very clearly understand that what he's doing is perceived as a little odd (and not just by YOU).

      If he keeps going back to that well, then yeah I think maybe he could still be clinging. Right now though he SOUNDS like a guy that just didn't know any better. I'd give him a shot and see if he bypasses all of the ex talk from here on out.

      Hope this helps.


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What Guys Said 3

  • Ohhhh... thats a definite red flag... and on a first date too..

    • Do you think it's bad enough that I shouldn't see him again? Should I ask him about it?

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    • well he already asked me to go for dinner and maybe drinks another time but yeah i'll update you on what happens

    • also if you read the comment I left on alwaysbelieving, let me know if that changes the context of things

  • Did you bring it up or he?

    • when we were messaging before I saw him I brought up the old old ex because I already kew her and wanted to know what had gone down. When we were out he bought it up

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    • Sounds like he's trying to learn from mistakes.

    • Yeah. so that's not a bad thing right?

  • Yeah, that's bad.

    • How come, cos he's not over them? It's annoying cos I do really fancy him.

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    • No, thank DodgersGM. He is a fine fellow.

    • haha I already did but yeah you both helped :)

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