Is it unfair to want to be with someone more attractive that you?

I'm a good person, I'm very respectful and intelligent. But of course, I want to have a beautiful girlfriend. Is that an unfair expectation? I workout 5 times per week, and eat healthy, but I'm short, don't have great facial features, and when looking at me (my body, nothing else) completely objectively, girls generally don't find me exceedingly attractive. I think it's mainly the height, which sucks lol.

Yes, I know that personality is more important, but I am asking about physical appearance, so you cal all unmount those high horses and answer the question.

I would never date someone I wasn't compatible with on an emotional and intellectual level, so it's kind of hard for me to have a better personality per se as we would most likely be very like-minded.

  • Yes, it's an unfair expectation.
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  • No
    67% (6)60% (3)64% (9)Vote
  • Yes, unless you are successful and/or rich
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  • No idea
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And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • More attractive then yourself? You sound like you have low self esteem in your looks department. I once dated a girl who I found to be super attractive. She said she thought I was super attractive and way out of her league. I remember having to remind her everyday how beautiful she was to me and she wouldn't hear it. She always saw herself as ugly and wondered why I was with her. What I'm saying is that just because you personally don't think you're hot, it doesn't mean someone else doesn't think you're the hottest thing they've ever seen.

    So, go for whomever you find attractive. Saying that you go for girls who you see as more attractive then yourself just means you have low self esteem. Don't compare yourself to them and just go for them. Hopefully you won't worry about that while in a relationship and remember your partner finds you hot whether you do or not.

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What Girls Said 3

  • No one particularly wants someone physically unattractive. They want the person on the inside, whether they're physically attractive or not. Who you choose to like is not being unfair, they are simply preferences. Of course, being successful or rich may attract people to whom those things matter, but true love may not be a priority.

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  • Well, I don't think you should EXPECT to be with someone more attractive then you, but of course it's ok to want that.

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  • omg were in the same boat I like this guy he's short no one seems to find him attractive but i think he's perfect <3 im not as fit I don't know he's rlly fit and my insecurity won't let me open up to him only if hed make a move

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What Guys Said 3

  • Depends on what you mean by fair. You will limit your options and may miss out on some great girls, maybe "The One" if you believe in that kind of thing. You don't have to date anyone and no one deserves to be
    with anyone (see that endless Nice Guy argument) so I don't think you're being unfair on other girls. You might be being unfair on yourself though. Fwiw, you're young and generally as people grow up they look at personality more so who knows if you'll still feel this way in 10 years.

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  • I don't think any preference is 'unfair'. You don't owe any girl anything, and no girl owes you nothing.

    As for whether a particular preference is realistically achievable, that's a separate question.

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  • Nope, nothing wrong with that, just like there's nothing wrong with a woman wanting to be with a man who is smarter, more successful and more socially connected. It's human nature.

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