I feel like I'm missing out, even though I love him to bits!?

Before I went overseas for 3 months me & the guy I was seeing decided NOT to be exclusive for the time I was away.

I have been sleeping with a guy here, purely sex, I don't have feelings for him.

I love my guy at home, but the guy I have been sleeping with is so attractive, muscled, great in bed, cuddles me as I sleep.

I feel guilty because my man at home lacks in most these areas. We've had a huge history & I love him. We are so close to being officially together. But this new guy is making me feel like I am missing out on something?


Most Helpful Guy

  • You clearly don't love him. Sleeping with someone, even if it's just for sex, means that you didn't think of him but of yourself. You didn't think that he will get hurt once he'll know of it, just because of your selfish impulse. You DO NOT love him.


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What Guys Said 2

  • if u loved him you wouldn't have fucked this new guy no matter how hot he was and you could've at least told ur boy back home before you did it... like fuk... u disgust me

  • You don't love him to bits, you're being delusional.

    You clearly like this new guy so stick with him seeing as he's 'so superior'. Unless this guy is not as safe (i. e. boring, reliable etc) as the guy back home?

    I notice with women that they'll go out play the field with the bad boys but then rush back to settle down with the boring steady Eddie's of this World.

    Have your cake and eating it too? Sure sounds like it.


What Girls Said 1

  • I have felt the same as you on more than one occasion. There is really nothing you can do to make these feelings go away. My on again off again boyfriend doesn't please me sexually and I often find myself playing with myself to find relief after almost every time we have sex. It gets frustrating. Well, when my boyfriend and I had split up for 4 months, I ended up hooking up with an old high school friend who was deployed in Cali for the Navy. Great in bed. Strictly sex. Just to find release. I love my 'boyfriend' but sexually, he really does not please me. As shallow and pathetic I sound right now, sex plays a big role in all relationships. If someone is sexually unsatisfying, you are more tempted to go find sexual compatiability else where. I have spoke to my boyfriend about things we can do differently but no matter what we try, it never works. He never lasts more than 5 minutes and the positions he wants to try are pretty much just for his pleasure. After 4 1/2 years of being off and on, you'd think that he would want to do something to please me as well, but nope.
    HOWEVER, I would never go out and find it elsewhere unless we are split up. I have only hooked up with one other person once in this 4 1/2 years. I felt guilty as fuck too. I dont know. Its such a tough situation.