To date or not to date (a coworker)?

Yup. Minimum wage job, I'm 18 he's 20. So it's not like one of those cubicle "I see them everyday" dating scenarios. (nothing in the rule book about it, plus plenty of people here have dated a coworker before).

I've worked here six months. He's worked here for 2 years. I didn't realize it at first, but I think I know now that I've really started falling for him. (and I don't think the falling is done, like I'm not "in love" yet but I feel like I want to try).

He's sweet. He laughs at all my jokes (even the stupid ones that really should be shunned). He's always friendly, to everyone. Really helpful, always willing to jump in and lend a hand.

That's the thing. He's nice to everyone. So I don't think he's flirting.

And, lots of girls like him. I have competition (if anyone would ever approach him, they never do for some reason, they just sit a distance and gawk). Not from coworkers, but random people. He's very attractive. He just doesn't seem to know it. He's goofy and awkward, and I am too.

He just seems too good for me? I don't even know if I'd stand a chance and I don't know what to do. Play it cool for a while and watch? Ask him out? Never speak of it again? Help, GAGers!

Updates:
So... if I am to pursue this, how do I get him to talk to me outside of a work setting? Because calling or texting him right now would make him think I was going to ask for him to cover or trade shifts with me.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Dont ever say you wouldn't stand a chance. You have to at least try. You never know whats going to happen. If you dont say anything now than you're going to regret it. He probably thinks that out of all those girls that try to flirt with him you are the one that he wants. Of course I dont know that for sure but there is only one way to find out. Take a chance and be brave! The guy doesn't always have to make the first move, so when you're ready just go for it :) Goodluck!

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    • Well, I've asked out lots of guys before. 6 to be exact. Only 2 said yes, and both changed their minds and went after another girl within a month.

    • Maybe he's different from other guys. Try and see if he likes you back. See if he gives you any hints and if you dont think he is interested than dont do anything. If you really really like him though then I guess you should tell him. Even if he doesn't like you back, it will be good to just get if off your chest and move on

    • Yeah. I can gage the situation I guess. I'm good at that.

What Guys Said 1

  • ask him out and hopefully its going to be a yes

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What Girls Said 2

  • you will never find out unless you try. I ve been there too like same prob. but not w/ a coworker (too shy to speak about it which resulted in never finding out cuz he moved for college) in other words DON'T be me.

    Just ask him during a lunch break if he wants to get food & start from there.

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    • I'm so nervous! This is freaking me out! He's so... amazing. I don't want to mess anything up. And all the other coworkers will be all like "WHAT? WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?" cause we're really close but I haven't told anyone. /facepalm

      I'm terrified.

  • Well what I'm going to recommend you do is talk to him, life is too short!

    What I would do is hang around him constantly to the point of awkwardness and then obsess over the fact that I was awkward and never speak to him again.

    Don't be me,

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    • But what if he's not interested and then it's awkward later? ><

    • Well this depends on if you want is friendship more, or a relationship more. If you value his friendship too much then maybe just try to be friends, and if he makes a move go for it. If you really like him it's going to be painful for you not to say anything, and it's going to get awkward anyway.

    • Yeah. I love him as a friend, but I'd like to know if we'd be good together. I've got a nagging feeling. I don't know. I'm trying to think through it, but I couldn't figure myself out so I came on here, lol.

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