How to make a long distance relationship happy and make it last?

Im currently in a long distance relationship, how can i make it last and work?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Talk every day. Send pictures or video chat so you can see each other. Be open and honest when. You miss each other. Text and keep in communication. Try to see each other as often as you can

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What Girls Said 15

  • It depends how much distance there is between you and your partner and how often you guys do get to see each other. My friend and I were both in long distance relationships. The difference was that my boyfriend works 2 hours away and we rotate visiting each other every weekend, while my friend was dating an olympian who trains in different countries all over the world for months at a time. She would get to see him for a couple of days, and then he would be off in Greece, and then Japan and then Austria, or wherever for 2-6 months. Both of us are absolutely in love with our boyfriends, but being away from the person you love is a lot to handle emotionally. I hate saying goodbye every Sunday night with my boyfriend and I'd only be without him for five days. I watched my friend getting sadder and sadder with every visit her boyfriend made, and it just got harder and harder for her to say goodbye. I don't have much optimism for couples who have to go months without seeing each other, but for people who can see each other every weekend or maybe even every other weekend, it causes a lot of emotional distress. Advice I have is to send cute messages just to let them know that you're thinking of them, calling, face timing, texting, and jumping at every opportunity to possibly see each other. That's it :)

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  • If you find out, let me know. Just ended one because it wasn't working. I think the best advice I can give you is for each of you to talk about your expectations of each other, see if they are doable, and if they are, hold each other accountable. Visit each other as often as possible. One thing that kept us together for awhile was watching the same tv show, it gave us something to talk about when there was a lull in conversation. Good luck!!

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  • Don't be the needy guy that you are!!! Don't expect her to text you back immediately or call you back immediately if she doesn't pick up the phone when you call her!!!

    Don't make your usual assumptions about her!!!

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  • Always stay in contact! Talk on the phone/skype/snapchat/video chat EVERYDAY and if you can't simply stay in contact over chat! Honestly, long distance relationships don't last that long if you don't have an end goal, for example, have plans to meet (if you haven't met before). A big part of a healthy, strong relationship is sex, and you can't really have sex if you are far away. But every relationship is different and you'll make it work! Good luck!

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    • Sex important in love relationship? I do have bf also and we are in LDR too. Have we do that every time we meet? I'm scared that he only want sex.

    • if you guys are in a long distant relationship and he only wants sex he wouldve broken up with you.. If he's still around he probably loves you

  • I know how u feel I am in a long distance to and me and my bf have been together for a year and a month

    To be in a long distance relationship u have I be loyal to one another and not flirt with other girls and have trust in one another and always do diffrent things in the relationship try to make it interesting everyday talk about new things and talk about the future and just try to always keep her happy treat her like a princes make her the only girl always have time for her be with her in the bad and good times if u really love her n wanna make it work don't let her go so easily.

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  • This one is hard. I know because I'm kind of going through this myself. Mine is 2 different countries so it can get really really complex sometimes. I find, the key to keeping anything, is simplifying. Easier said than done. What exactly is the problem? Is there a problem?

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  • I have been in many... but none have lasted. So as long as she is keeping her legs closed and her mouth open (communicating with you even when she's pissed or hurt or doubtful of things lasting). Same goes for you... except keep it in your pants. Yes its possible, and keep your mouth open to communicate with her. Ultimately... I haveno clue though.

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  • Talk every day, show interest in his/her opinions, ask questions about his/her day, have Skype sex, tell her/him how much you love her/him

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    • Tell him? Im a guy

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    • The only problem is that the Bible is written by humans, not by God and can be analyzed in a lot of different ways. I do not understand why you care about what someone else chooses to do with his or her life, but just a tip - stop caring so much about things that is none of your business.
      Love and respect to you, I hope you have a good life.

    • The Apostles and witness of Jesus Christ.. You are very confused. Why do I care because I follow the Lord Jesus Christ and he wants me to witness to others. As I keep telling you read the bible

  • Trust! Communicate.

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    • why are some telling me it won't work when it is working so far

    • Mine failed but I know what I did wrong. If both of you want this to work out, it will.

      Maybe people say is not going to work because is not east. What I think is that if you really love someone you make a lot of things to happen but if it is only just another girlfriend or boyfriend in the list, why are they going to commit?

      If you don't love someone is going to be so easy to cheat but if you love someone you will do everything for him/her and yourself.

      Be positive! You can do it.
      My ex and I broke up but we ended not in bad terms and I still care about him.

      This is your fight, not theirs.

  • Have a set date for when you'll finally see each other. It helps a lot having something to look foward to. That is the one reason why my long distance relationship failed. It felt like the distance between us would never end.

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  • Don't date long distance. It will last and be a lot better if the two of you were together in person.
    My friend went to meet his long distance gf, and then decided to move in with her and find work where she lives. They are now engaged :)

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  • Be yourself, laugh most of the time, and have fun.

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  • Send her surprise care packages, trust each other, and realize that love conquers anything.

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  • Have loyality and commitment is all I can tell you.

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  • Try to have fun conversations both you and her will enjoy

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What Guys Said 17

  • In my university days, before smartphones and webcams, my friends would always get in long-distance relationships and they would crumble. They would talk on the phone, and get in an argument - and due to the distance, they could never make up in person (or have make-up sex) which probably put more strain on the issue.

    When I got in my first LD relationship around 30 years old, I was fearful of this. I outlined several things to make my LD relationship work. Keep in mind that I was only dating this girl for 4 months before I told her I had to leave across the country for a year.

    Rules of LD relationships:
    1. Buy her a webcam and make regular video chats. In my case, I had to talk to her every day.
    2. You must never mention another woman.
    3. You must give subtle hints that you are not happy where you are because she's not with you. That means that you do not mention going to parties with other people, or having a fun time.
    4. Even if you have nothing to chat about that day, keep the webcam on so she can see you watching TV, doing work at your desk, or eating a sandwich. In a way, you guys are living life together while apart, while also showing her there is no other girl around in your bed.
    5. Talk only about positive things and funny things that happened (that doesn't include girls).

    Realize that when you're apart, a woman's brain will always think of worst case scenarios. Are you seeing someone else? Are you sleeping with someone behind her back? Are you having so much fun over there that you'll forget about her?

    Your actions should be aimed at alleviating those innate fears, without actually mentioning them to her.

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    • Fyi, as soon as I came back to town, I asked her to move in with me. I proposed 2 years later and married her about 6 weeks ago. So LD relationships do work, if you approach it well.

    • Very good poins.. I do all of those.. Num 2,3,4 are very important

  • Best tips I have are simple talk often. Texting is great for during the day and webcams at night. Try to find ways to do cyber dates. Rent and watch movie while skyping each other. If you are both into video games that is even better, get a good coop game. Netflix and Skype are a great thing. Talk about your feelings and be honest. Never put yourself in compromising positions like going to a party with a friend who you know likes you. Im not saying you would cheat but being out with the opposite gender can make all those hard feelings about the Long distance really stand out. You will look around and go why am I putting up with this crap with all these great women right here. Visit each other as often as you can and make those trips the best you can.

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    • I was in a LDR for 1 1/2 years with a girl I almost married. Its tough you just have to be strong. Also find a hobby to keep you busy when you guys are not together. It will keep your mind off the other stuff.

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    • I moved their and the economy in her area was terrible for finding work on top of that the cost of living in her area was also very high. Working maybe at best 35 to 40 hours between us did not work. So we moved back to my area to live here for a year and its pretty much the opposite here jobs are easy to find and cost of living it low. At the end of that year we were to move some place else. Long story short she treated my family like shit for 3 months even after we got her a management job. Constantly insulted my area because it "was not the same". Quit 2 jobs that where handed to her then told me she was moving home. She told me that we could stay together but i had to move to a new area and get a job and a place to live basically put my name on all this stuff in a far away location so she could move there after. When like I said she had shown 0 ability to leave her home area. I love her and I get that moving was very hard on her and sent her into a deep depression but

    • after 3 years of a long distance relationship I did not want to go back to one even for a little bit. Also we WERE engaged that to me was a huge commitment that means putting the WE before the ME and she was basically walking away from the WE because she couldnt do 1 year some place she did not like the best. Also again she expected me to later on down the road trust her to move to another new location where i would be using all my saved money and putting my name on a house with her history of freaking out about moving. Yeah that was not going to happen. So any other tips I would have is work out a moving plan early on or at least bench marks to reach. Like after a year of dating we talk about moving. After a 6 months of that one of us moves. Basically have plans and talk about them.

  • I was in it and I am a pro I made it work

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  • Do a lot of Skype sex. It works great. Send her a daily text. Don't forget a card for the holidays and jerk off a lot to tie you over until you can be reunited.

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  • i'll tell you one thing... you'll never know if your gf is cheating on you in a LD relationship. if you can ignore this, then it MAY last :-PPPP

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  • I have lots of experience with this. The bottom line is, you'll have long periods of loneliness and sexual frustration, waiting for her, only to find out she's had a boyfriend or sex buddy there all along and kept you waiting.

    Long distance relationships suck ass. Do yourself a favor and leave.

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    • First off we are engaged and second she has waited 6 months before.. people aren't as horny as you think. I waited before and have had no problems with waiting

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    • We have skyped for about a month. we talk for 5 hrs everyday

    • You're gonna Skype for the rest of your life?

  • I don't know... I never had experience... but i'd say it's pretty hard. try using the phone or video chat rather than texting/emailing/facebooking/etc. a lot of times, people misunderstand the tone or attitude of their partner and get into unnecessary fights. trust me, it has happened... you want to get as real of a connection with her as possible.

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    • I had this issue with my last ex she was terrible at reading context in a text message. We eventually had a rule that if she started to misunderstand me I would just say "save this for later" and we both drop it and talk about something new lol.

  • I think Skype would definitely need to be mandatory, so that you can see your love. However, long TERM long distance relationships absolutely NEVER work out. Only short term long distance relationships work between the two, although short terms don't work out that much better.

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  • Their are very hard to have u just gonna go day by day call her every day try to see every chance u get send her videos and pictures of u stay in contact with her every long distance relationship i had alway ended bur hopefully u love each other that miles is just a number good luck

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  • I've been in 4 and it's not a successful outcome most of the time. If both of you are very busy it woks better. We set visits 1-2 times per month with fun things planned and lots of sex. This was the best part. If you are not always staying occupied while apart, it is not fun.
    if you fall deeply in love and then the other person breaks up, it really sucks. I say don't do it.

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    • Im already engaged to her

    • OK, then, make plans to get married and who's the one moving? Best this is that you are the MAN, and you have a career, bead winner. Alfa male, you are a leader and show her that you are going to provide and take care of her, with her there as your "help mate" I hate looser guys that have no plan.

  • My parents used to write letters all the time and visit each other for years. They looked happy in the old photos. That's the best I can say.

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  • I agree with earlobelover. My girlfriend and I live in two different states and when I text or call her I just wait for her to get back to me. We are both very busy people and I know that in her time she will get back to me. I know not to keep up trying to contact her. It would be a sure fire way to loose her.

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    • I know the asker and he cannot do it!! He's very needy and has no patience!! He thinks everyone has to message or call him back right away. He assumes negative things if they don't!! But it's ok for the asker not to respond right away and he always has a valid reason or justification why he didn't respond right away. But according to him, nobody else has a valid reason why they didn't respond right away.

  • I've been in a long distance relationship for 2 years cause her dad but I see her like twice a month we hate it but we miss each other sooo much and its kind good that qe miss each other cause when we see eachother we give eachother long hugs and lost of kisses aha

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  • get out while you can she will get bored. trust me I wish I listened to my sisters. I gave that girl the world i traveled to mexico and met then flew her up here only for her to talk to more boys than me on Facebook hardcore flirting 2 years down the drain and 3 years getting over her. IF she's THE ONE just dont be jealpus let her do what she wants and dont question cause they get a stick up their ass when you get suspicious

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  • Honestly I believe there is no long distance success. I have tried it a couple times and even witnessed friends try it, it always failed because one of them cheated or something

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  • Long distance relationships always fall apart unless you go move closer the the other persob

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  • Being honest, keep the communication and good cam sex. ;)

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