Would it be smart...

I've been... doing this guy for a month or two now, um and we haven't talked about dating. So I was thinking of sometime the beginning of next month, asking him... how serious would you say we are... does that sound like a good question. Because I'm not gonna ask him to be in a relationship with me or say anything too serious that might scare him off...

Updates:
or ...the times we hang out are awesome and I want to hang out with you again regardless, but are we ever going to be anything more?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sorry, but you put the cart before the horse by having sex with him before dating him. Most guys who are in this type of situation are pretty happy with continuing the sex without any commitment. In fact, it can be hard to start dating because, well, he hasn't had to so far.

    And the idea of the girl asking the guy to date or if they want a relationship is backward too. Girls love dating, we love relationships. Guys are not always eager to enter into these situations. And sex is not enough to get a guy interested in more. They actually have to have an emotional connection to you, like friendship, and in your age range they are usually getting that from their buddies, not a girl.

    With all that said, you really have nothing to lose by telling him you would like to do more with him than meet for sex. The worst that will happen is he will tell you he's not ready for that and he likes things how they are and you then get to decide if you are happy or if you expected this to turn into something more than a sex-only thing. If it stays sex-only be prepared for it to stay that way and most likely fizzle out. Even for guys they have their limits in how long they enjoy sex with a girl they don't have any other attachment to. They would rather just move on to a new conquest.

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    • Thanks, and he's over 8 years older.

    • That is not good. Don't ever sell yourself short again. I have had FWB situations but have always required dating as a part of it. If the guy did not care enough to take me out, I don't need him. I am no longer interested in FWB now though because it just isn't fulfilling. The best sex in the world for me is with a guy who is totally in to me. That is a huge turn-on and a casual F*** buddy is not enough fun.

What Guys Said 1

  • Youre a booty call, and you always will be to this guy.

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    • Well I'm still asking him.

    • You can ask him. But instead of doing that, don't do anything sexual with him, and let him know you're done doing sexual stuff. If he has a problem with it and leaves, then obviously that's all you were. If he doesn't mind, and he keeps hanging out with you, knowing he's not getting anything then you're more then a booty call

    • Now that's good advice, thanks.

What Girls Said 1

  • Well, the question is really, do you want to be in a relationship? If he's still "doing you' haha, he's probably still interested in you. So don't worry!

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