Be honest, guys: do you naturally want a girl more when she plays hard to get?

say for instance, there's a girl you like, and she likes you too. You guys have been getting all romantic and sexual, etc. but you're type of relationship isn't really established. Say she doesn't constantly text you and acts a little coy?

Like I'm the opposite of obsessive, when I like someone, I play it super cool and it keeps that mystery going and that attraction. It takes me time to open up to people and I don't always text them or text back right away or anything. So I naturally play hard to get, I don't mean to but it just works out for me. I've noticed when this happens, the guys seem to act more interested? I don't know. I'm wondering if you desire a girl more when she isn't all up in your grill, does her own thing, and takes time, etc.


Most Helpful Guy

  • When I was 17, that totally worked on me.

    Then I grew up, and by 19, I knew that girls are like cats. If you have to pursue, you're wasting your time. Sit down, relax, and either the cat will come to you or it won't. If she runs off, let her go, instead of running after her like an idiot.

    • That's why men don't pursue women these days and dating is haywire. Yes a man needs to chase the girl at least in the beginning.

    • @Jennsmith9982
      I'd still say girls are like cats. If you want to make friends with a cat, you walk over near her, crouch, and hold out your hand. Either the cat accepts your offer, or doesn't. You don't chase! That just makes her run away, and makes you look like an idiot. Chasing cats or girls is a waste. You crouch, offer your hand, and that's it. She'll either take it or leave it.


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What Guys Said 8

  • mystery is always attractive... so yes guys like hard to get unless their shy... there's 2 many hard to get women out there im tired of playing chess every time i want to establish our relationship lol

    its sexy and the possibilities are endless but the same could be said for a woman that steps up and says what she likes and wants

  • It's perfectly fine and does build up a certain appeal and respect for her just as long she gives me strong signs that she could like me, some girls are too good at playing hard to get haha

  • A little is okay but nothing more than that because I don't want to start over-thinking things after she's stopped contact for a few days.

    • In what way do you overthink?

    • @Asker - like... dang it's been a few days since my text, should I call, should I call leave a message, or text and call, am I even a prospect still or has she stopped contact because she's found someone more compatible and now she's giving me the cold shoulder? I keep my 2 day rule religiously. If's been two days and still got nothing not even a hello, or my bad was busy then fuck it. Moving on, plus if the connection was great, lots of common interests, goals and that we both had said we were serious about getting into r/s that we both got no time for games, well then what's going on, seems like the game is a foot already! NEXT!

  • This is something new? What girl does not play coy? I have never met a girl who does not play coy. And I think for many guys that mystery will keep their attention. Personally for me I would prefer the girl to be open and honest. But if she is not comfortable opening up, then I would appreciate if she would communicate that to me. But that is me

    • I've told this guy It takes me time to open up..

    • Well I think that is great! So if he cares about you or respects you, then he should understand that. Personally I hate playing the game soo much, but if I were and you knew he liked you, I would make sure I gave him the impression I was interested in him. I know girls always want to get a read that the guy likes them before they start hinting more obvious lol such a game

  • personally i hate it but im kinda girly in the way i like attention so i dont think my opinion is valid haha

  • Not at all. Girls only do this because it's what they're attracted to, so they assume guys are attracted to it as well.

    Same as guys being clingy and overly nice to women. That's what guys like, so they subconsciously assume girls are attracted to the same behavior.

  • Frankly, I have better things to do with my time than play games. It's a major turn off. Most people allow others to abuse their time with abandon and with complete lack of accountability. I do not. No person is so important or interesting or sexy for me to tolerate them trying to jerk me around and waste time. It's one thing for things to be fun and flirty--it's another to be playing hard to get.

    Don't go out on a date with me? You don't exist.
    Don't have sex within the first few dates? You're gone.
    Try to play hard to get? What was her name?
    Don't answer a phone or a text in a reasonable amount of time? I'm already talking to the next girl.

    Playing hard to get works when the guy doesn't have other options or with guys who don't value themselves. For other men, you can't make yourself irrelevant in more sure a manner.

    • I had sex with him already, he knows I like him at this point, I'm not totally playing hard to get. Just not showing tons of interest.

    • Gee ur the reason the male
      Species is as deplorable as it is.

    • Haha, someone seems to be bitter toward men right now. @Jennsmith9982

      Asker, if you already had sex and you go too cool, he isn't likely to continue things. You don't want to be all over him, but if you back off entirely, he'll move on--you still have to show interest. The best things is simply to be honest about where you are. Doesn't mean you outright say it, but let it show a bit. A guy isn't going to invest effort where the chances seem slim of something working out.

  • No, my first thought is "she probably doesn't like me anymore”


What Girls Said 1

  • Men are idiots. They don't know what they want. If you act normal they say they can't read u or aren't giving off the right signals. If u tell them u want them they still say ur playing hard to get. In fact men are crazy. Nothing u do is right for the losers. Play hard to get and ur not showing enough interest yet they don't have to do anything. I told a guy the other guy I wanted him to touch me and other stuff he later said my body language showed different. Men are imbeciles. They say women are crazy men are worse. Just let them turn gay and do each other it's what most of the losers do these days anyway

    • If ur pretty ur too intimidating. If ur ugly ur their type. If ur fat they feel more secure with someone. They attack pretty women. They r sniveling nutjobs.