Do guys just use this as an excuse?

A guy that I've been digging has kissed me a couple times. I've spent the night with him twice but all we did was kiss and fall asleep. At one point we did tell each other that we liked each other but it was after a night of drinking. When we talked sober he said that he wasn't ready to be in a relationship (which is ok with me cuz I don't know that I'm ready either) and we agreed to just continue hanging out and having fun like we have been.

He's been a little standoffish since then and now I'm wondering if it was just an excuse so he wouldn't have to tell me that he didn't like me or maybe he was scared of hurting my feelings. Any thoughts?


Most Helpful Guy

  • No I think he has feelings for you but now he knows you're not ready. By the way "digging?" That's so 70's, I love it

    • Lol I use that expression & I'm 14...

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    • Well at this point it isn't a relationship

    • I completely agree! Lol I just want to get to know each other, have fun and let whatever happens happen. It just seems like whenever feelings are confessed guys always assume that a girl is gonna be like "ok, now you're my boyfriend." Hahaha


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What Guys Said 2

  • I get the standoffish part. He feels that things are different and doesn't know how to react, doesn't want to do something that would come off as couplish or say anything. I feel similar in the position I am. I have starting to like a girl that's a friend that I have known since I was 14. I'm 23 years old and still don't get seems like a Im still in high school and I dont know how to react. Its like a light switch. You are friends with someone that's on position and the other end its a relationship/dating. Right now its right in the middle and if you ever put a light switch right in the middle. The light can either be on or off. Alcohol does make you more relaxed and lets you say things that you wouldn't if you were sober so I believe that he meant it. Now what you have to do is make him feel comfortable when he is around you and that nothing has really changed. Your friends but with kissing and maybe other stuff down the road.

  • He was probably nervous, maybe he feels a little embarrassed that he didn't do anything with you so that's why he's avoiding you.

    • Well I would love to keep doing what we have been and hopefully get to the point of doing more. I'm just not the girl that sleeps with every guy. Ya know?

What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think a guy would drunkenly tell you he likes you to spare your feelings. If anything, he'd be more honest.

    • That's what I thought too. I thought maybe he was trying to spare my feelings by telling me he wasn't ready for a relationship instead of telling me he just didn't like me.