Is there a such thing as too nice in a relationship?

Hi im 19 and currently in the military. But I've been quite a few relationships over the last year or so. I know I'm young and all still but a few relationships have ended and I get a common reason of being a little to nice or tried to hard? It blows my mind lol, I don't ever make moves towards sex so I guess is it bad I'm a genuinely nice guy in a relationship?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Girls hate nice guys, and love jerks. That's no secret. I've been dumped for being "too nice" also. That's why I'm an asshole now. Being an asshole is really great, not just because girls will like you more, but also because you don't have to put up with any bullshit from anyone.

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    • I guess there's perfect balance lol

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    • Well thing is they compliment me a fuck ton, I hit the gym and I'm an active guy. I have had sex with a few of these girls and only 1 of them was apart of this post. But I mean hell if I gotta be a assholes sometimes then it won't kill me lol

    • You don't have to be outright mean to them just stop caring so much.

What Girls Said 3

  • OMFG are you serious they have love you cause you're too nice? OMG where r you? I need someone like you... lol

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    • I meant leave you ****

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    • Haha well thank you! But yea they have literally said that, and it's kinda crappy! All I want is a genuine relationship, and I feel like I'm not pushing any boundaries. It's weird, maybe they just aren't committed enough?

    • Check your messages :)

  • No such thing as being too nice a bad thing.

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  • No, there's not such thing. They just weren't your people.

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What Guys Said 5

  • You sound a bit spineless and reminscent of a doormat. Strange given your service.

    Don't bend to their every whim. You're not a servant. If you want some sex, go for some. If you're making out with a girl and the mood is right, gently take hold of certain body parts on her...

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  • Girls here will say things like "No such thing as being too nice" which is a lie. A relationship is almost like a partnership, where 2 people meet and try and live both their lives simultaneously. If you are being too nice, then you need to stop. Your gf needs to learn to live with you knowing how you are normally, and vice versa. Dont be a doormat

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  • Yea, being nice is a BIG problem my friend. Girls will fight us on this but that's the truth. For example, if you kiss your girlfriend and you want to grab her ass, do it. Don't think about what she'll think. You gotta take charge. No offense buddy, but you're in the military. If you can't act like a boss, then you'll fail in relationships and in serving this country.

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  • No. There is such a thing as being an annoying motherfucker who goes out of his way to be a bitch. That's about it.

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    • Wait are you saying I could be annoying, and a little bitch?

    • Yes. Let me tell you something: You sound great on paper. Which is a problem. Anyone who sounds great on paper is fucked up in some way. "I am a gentleman and a scholar, surely women want this?", oh they do, yes, but that's not the problem. There's some other problem. You ask if you can be too nice, I ask "How the fuck can you be too [positive trait]?"

    • So nice isn't the problem, most likely it was something else. Alright haha makes pretty good sense actually

  • Yes there is.

    You're not sexual enough by the sounds of things, the girls are probably waiting for you to a move and you aren't.

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